Page 149 of Carry On


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“The Humdrum killed her,” Agatha says.

Penny holds her teacup up, gesturing with it. “Not according to her, he didn’t.”

Agatha looks confused. And a little pissed off.

I look to Baz. It seems like he should be the one to tell this part, as much of it as he wants to, but he’s back at his whiteboard, filling out theEverything we knowcolumn—ghosts, Visitings, vampires.Penny jumps up as soon as Baz addsNicodemusto the list.

I take her place on the couch next to Agatha.

“When did this all start?” Agatha asks me.

“When the Veil thinned,” I say. “Natasha Grimm-Pitch came through to find Baz and found me instead. She wants him to find her murderer. When Baz came back, I told him I’d help him figure it out.”

Agatha’s eyebrows are almost touching in the middle, and her nose is wrinkled. “Why?”

“Because it seemed like the right thing to do.”

“Itdid?”

I shrug. “Yeah. I mean—it was an attack on Watford. A murder.”

“What did the Mage say about all this?”

“He didn’t. Exactly.” I look down at my lap, scratching the hair above my neck. “Penny and Baz don’t think we should tell him.”

“Pennyand Bazthink?”

“It’s Baz’s mum,” I say, “so I feel like I should respect his wishes on this.”

“But Baz hates you!”

I nod. “I know. We’re sort of… on a truce?”

“Simon, listen to yourself—atruce?”

“You went to a vampire bar!” Penny shouts from across the room. Baz must be catching her up. “What a pair of splendid morons you are! Did you take photos?”

“Vampires don’t show up in photos,” I say.

“That’s mirrors, you dolt,” Baz says.

“You can’t see yourself in the mirror?”

Baz ignores me and goes back to telling Penny about Nicodemus.

“But…” Agatha is staring at the two of them. “Baz is dark. He’sevil.”

“I thought you never believed that,” I say.

“I absolutely believed it,” she says. “You told us he was avampire,Simon. Wait—” She turns to him, then back to me. “—did he just now admit that heisa vampire?”

I pull at the hair on my neck. I can tell I’m making an idiotic face. “I’m not sure it’s that simple…”

“That Baz is a vampire?”

“No, he’s definitely a vampire,” I say. “I guess it is that simple. But you can’t tell anyone, Agatha.”

“Simon,you’vealready told everyone. You’ve been telling everyone since we were third years.”