Kill her,Lestara ordered from his thoughts.Give your father justice. Prove your loyalty to your brother.
But his hands refused to tighten. Refused to cut off her breath entirely, because it would mean watching the life disappear from those eyes.
With a scream of frustration, James flung himself away from her. He leaned against the wall of the cabin, head in his hands, raging at his inability to do what needed to be done. Lowering his hands, he stared at her. “I hate you, Ahnna Kertell. I hate you more than I believed was possible. You deserve death, and it will come for you, even if I’m too much of a coward to do it.”
“James,” she said around the gag. “I didn’t—”
“Shut up!” he screamed. “I don’t want to hear any of your poison. Don’t say another fucking word.”
“Please—”
He snatched up the blanket and tore off another strip. Thicker this time, and he shoved it in with the first gag, silencing her. Yet Ahnna still watched him, her gaze making his skin burn, so he threw theblanket over her face. He didn’t want to hear her, didn’t want to look at her, in case whatever power she had over him took control of his mind and caused him to go back on his oath to his family entirely.
Kicking open the door, James strode out into the snow to where Maven waited, her coat crusted with blood in several places after their near escape from the avalanche. He stroked her neck, losing himself to the memory of how she’d leapt forward, just barely clearing the slide as it swept across the trail.
Small rocks and shards of ice had struck them as they galloped on, and only when the roar ceased did he rein the mare in and look back.
The path had disappeared.
The slope was a carnage of torn-up trees, rocks, and snow, with the faint haze of smoke hanging over all of it. To cross it on foot would be a challenge. No horse could make it across without breaking a leg.
On the far side of the avalanche, his men gaped at him from atop their horses.
“Major General, are you all right?” Arthur shouted. “Are you hurt?”
Blood ran down James’s cheek from where a rock had struck him, and Maven had several small wounds, but James shouted back, “I’m fine!”
“Easy, girl,” he’d murmured as he dismounted. Maven was snorting wildly, her sides soaked with sweat. Pulling off his greatcoat, he draped it over her neck and shoulders, walking her back and forth until her sides ceased heaving. Rubbing her forehead, he said, “I’m sorry for doing that to you.”
James wished he could promise it would never happen again.
Arthur was slowly picking his way across the debris. Leaving Maven to rest, James ventured onto the mess of rock, broken trees, and snow, eventually meeting the other man in the middle.
“With the utmost respect, are you mad?” Arthur demanded. “If your mare was a fraction of a second slower, you’d both be pulp at the bottom of this mountain.” He gestured downslope, where rocks and debris were still bouncing down and down.
“It would be impossible to catch her on foot, so I had no other choice.” James wiped away the melting snow. The droplets that struck the ground were stained pink from a cut on his face. “To backtrack to another pass would put us days behind, and she’d reach the border long before us.”
Despite the logic of the argument, Arthur stared at him as though he spoke gibberish.
Sighing, James said, “I’ll take all the supplies you can spare and pursue her while you backtrack. Do you have a map?”
Arthur silently retrieved a creased map from the inner pocket of his greatcoat and handed it over. James spread it on a rock. “Resupply and get more reinforcements, then come up this trail here.” He traced a route to the north of their current position. “Once I have her, I’ll return via the same route and meet you.”
Arthur frowned. “To do that will take you right to the border, sir.”
James shrugged. “The Amaridians don’t patrol deep into the Blackreaches this time of year, and besides, it’s hardly the first time I’ve ventured onto their soil. I’ll be in and out before they notice.”
“Alone?”
“I can handle Ahnna Kertell.” James shoved the map into his pocket. “She believes her avalanche cut us off and that we can’t pursue. She’ll lower her guard, and I’ll catch her unaware. Bring her back for execution.”
At the time, it had been a lie, because he had fully intended to cut her throat himself. Fully intended to prove to his family that they had his loyalty, no matter his past mistakes.
Except he hadn’t been able to do it.
He led Maven back to the cabin, then took the rope fastened to her saddles and used it to bind Ahnna tightly. He desperately wanted to fling her over Dippy’s back and lead her straight back to Harendell, but the snow was falling heavily and Maven was exhausted. James was exhausted, too, and if he didn’t get some rest and food in his stomach, he might make a mistake.
He led Maven into the space at the rear, Dippy whinnying happily at the sight of his stablemate. Maven pinned her ears and snapped at the gelding, in no mood for his cheerful demeanor, although she calmed as James untacked her and brushed the sweat marks from her coat. Feeding and watering both animals, he left them to rest and returned to the living quarters.
