It was hard not to laugh at William’s hypocrisy. “None taken.”
“Lestara’s only goal was to aid in the rise of a ruler who would have the best interest of the Maridrinian people at heart,” William continued. “It was foolish of her, of course, and not a mistake my mother would have made, but Lestara was young and inexperienced. Being raised in Cardiff, as she was, there was no opportunity for her to be educated in the ways of policy, and Petra took advantage of her sweet nature. As did your brother. What was his name?”
“Royce.” Keris remembered all too well how easily Lestara had manipulated his half brother.
“That’s right! Royce! At any rate, all the casualties in Vencia unfortunately must be set at your feet, Veliant. You turned your back and lowered your guard, leaving the defense of your capital to women. I read the copies of the letters Petra wrote that you sent on to my father. Petra was a sly bitch who took advantage, that much was very clear to me. You were responsible for protecting Lestara, but you didn’t. I will not make the same mistake, and beneath my mother’s tutelage, Lestara will become a fine queen.”
Zarrah reached into the pocket of her uniform and withdrew several pieces of paper. “Her Imperial Majesty respects Your Grace’s intelligence and capacity to make informed decisions in all things regarding the governance of Harendell, but she feels compelled to ensure you are in possession of all possible information. To that end, she has charged me with delivering correspondence written by the lady Lestara, which was discovered among Empress Petra’s personal effects. These are the original copies, which means they are in Lady Lestara’s own hand.”
Keris bit his tongue and crossed his arms, noting that William eyed the letters like he’d been presented with a handful of earthworms.
“One passage, in particular, caught Her Imperial Majesty’s attention.” Zarrah unfolded a page and cleared her throat. “There is no price I won’t pay, no cost too high, to ensure my destiny as queen of Maridrina. Too long has the nation floundered beneath the rule of men, and yet Maridrinians still do not see the merits of female rule. That the Veliants continue to reign is the fault of the people, and it seems to me that they will not see the error of their ways unless they are forced to pay the ultimate price. Perhaps when all they hold dear lies in smoke and ruin and shallow graves, they will reach for the alternative that our alliance provides.”
Nausea twisted in Keris’s stomach at the coldness of Lestara’s words. There could be no denying that she knew exactly what she was agreeing to by allying with Petra, and had felt no remorse at thedeath and destruction it would bring down upon Vencia. She could atone for the rest of her life and never make up for half of what she’d done.
William’s expression was entirely blank as Zarrah handed the letters to the guard who’d accompanied her in. He circled the table and set them before his king. Keris half expected William to light them up using the lamp flame on the table, but instead he read in silence. A slight tic formed in his jaw as he took in Lestara’s words, then he tucked the pages into the inner pocket of his coat. “We thank the empress for her concern.”
“By your leave, Your Grace,” Keris said, “I’ll hear my own reports in private.”
William flicked his fingers in dismissal, then reached for his glass.
Keris jerked his chin at Zarrah, who followed him from the room. Saam and the rest of his guard fell into step with them as he walked through the Sky Palace, Saam searching his rooms before giving him a slight nod. “I’ll leave Daria to convey the empress’s report,” he said, nothing in his expression giving away that Zarrah was anything other than a Valcottan soldier. “You will not be disturbed.”
Keris wasn’t entirely certain that was a good thing, because though Zarrah’s expression was bland, he could feel anger seething from her.
Saam closed the door behind him, and Zarrah reached out and put the latch in place.
Silence stretched, and he finally said, “I’m sorry.”
She crossed her arms. “For what? Not returning to Valcotta, as you promised me? Or for doing the exact opposite of staying out of danger by diving headfirst into it? Or is there something else you have to be sorry for?”
“I was actually referring to me implying you were a cannibal to the king of Harendell, but it was for your own good. William’s a womanizer, and if he’d put his hands on you, I’d have had to kill him. So I take it back, I’m not actually sorry.”
Zarrah’s eyes narrowed.
He’d thought about what he’d say to her when they were reunited, rehearsed a thousand apologies for having gone back on his word, for not consulting with her before leaving for Harendell, and most of all, for their argument just before he’d left Pyrinat and all that had led up to it. Yet every carefully composed word now tasted sour as lies, because the truth was, he had no regrets.
“When I learned you’d been put on Devil’s Island, it felt like I stood alone,” he finally said. “It felt like I was the only one who was willing to fight for your freedom, but then Aren and Lara agreed to help. They risked their lives, and the lives of their people, in order to aid me, and then answered my call to war to defeat Petra. Now the desperation is theirs, and I couldn’t leave them to stand alone.” He swallowed hard, wishing he could read her expression. “Just as you wouldn’t leave them to stand alone, and for me to waste precious time asking a question I already knew the answer to would be admitting I don’t know your heart as well as I know my own.”
He heard her soft intake of breath, saw the slight softening in the tension of her jaw, but his wife didn’t speak.
“I know it has been harder than either of us dreamed,” he continued. “But I would rather die from poison in my cup than stop being a man worthy of your love, Valcotta.”
Zarrah bit her bottom lip, blinking rapidly, then she said, “I don’t want you to be anyone other than who you are.” In three quick strides, she closed the distance between them. “But we fight these battles together. Live and die together. You swore that to me when you made me your wife, and that’s why I’m here.”
53
Zarrah
It felt like she’d beenapart from Keris for an eternity rather than a matter of months, and Zarrah’s breath had caught in her throat when she’d first stepped into William’s office. Like seeing him for the first time but also being reconnected with the other half of her soul. It had made her forget herself. Made her forget all the plans she’d forged in the arduous journey north, which had taken far longer than she had hoped. Every second of it plagued with fear for her own life, Keris’s life, and the lives of all those she held dear.
But now she was reunited with her husband, and in his presence Zarrah’s fears melted away as she inhaled his familiar scent and drowned in the azure ocean of his eyes.
Keris caught hold of her and pulled her close, and Zarrah didn’t resist. Allowed herself to be tucked against him, his heartbeat rapid but steady in her ear, and she drew in a shuddering breath, throat tight with too much emotion.
“I’ve hated every second away from you.” His fingers tangled in her loose curls, which had grown past her shoulders, and a soft whimper escaped her lips as he tugged, tilting her face upward.
“Even when you were gambling, drinking, carousing, and womanizing with William?” She gave him a slow smile. “I heard all sorts of rumors when I reached Sableton.”
