“Jesus, Connor. What about a party? Won’t she want one?”
“Yeah. I’ll ask the mums at the school gate on Monday. See if they can come round next Saturday.”
“That’s how you do it?” She looked horrified. “You don’t send out invitations weeks before getting people to save the date? How can you be sure the friends she wants to come will be able to make it?”
He shrugged. “It usually works out.” Touched by her obvious concern about Ellie, he kissed her.
“What’s that for?”
“For being worried that my daughter won’t get the party she deserves.” He settled an arm around her, hugging her close. “You’re right, I should have got my arse into gear earlier. Organization has never been a strong point for me. I bumbled along in the early years, but when she started school, it became a real issue, having to get her there at a certain time, dressed,andwith a bloody packed lunch. I can’t tell you how often she was late and lunch-less that first year. Just when I’d got the hang of it, the school moved the goalposts with homework and slips of paper I was meant to sign and return.”
Her fingers traced distracting circles across his pecs. “Don’t be too hard on yourself. Most guys in their mid-twenties can barely manage to get themselves out of bed in the morning.”
He brought her hand to his lips and kissed her fingers. “Bet at that age, you woke at five, checked the markets, ran three miles, prepped for your meetings over breakfast. All before heading into work at seven.”
“Maybe.” She gave him a sly smile. “But I’m a woman. I said mostguys.”
Laughter rumbled out of him. “I want to defend my sex, but the reason Ellie always has her closest friends at her party is that their mums know how shit I am at organizing and have her birthday in their diaries.”
“So you basically charmed your way into getting other people to be organized on your behalf. Sneaky.”
“You can call it sneaky or you can call it working with what I’ve got.” He kissed her temple, every cell in his body wanting to scream out how much he loved her. “By the way, you don’t need to worry about a gift. I’ve got that covered. The riding school gave me a list of stuff she needs, so I’ll go through that tomorrow.” He grimaced. It was going to kill him when he had to tell her the money had run out.
“Has she got a riding hat?”
He shook his head. “Nope. But I told you—”
“I want to get her something, Connor, and I’d rather it was something she wanted.” She shifted so she was sitting up, the duvet still blocking part of his view. “I also want to cover her lessons for another year.”
“Whoa.” He slid his hands up her arms, rested them on her shoulders, feeling the dent to his pride like a punch to the gut. “First, why do you think we need it? Second, paying for her lessons is my responsibility.”
Her eyes met his, direct as always. “First, Ellie said you’d told her you didn’t know how many lessons you could afford. And she didn’t say it in a whining, moaning way, she said it in a very mature ‘Lessons are expensive’—though she said’spensive—‘and they’re going to stop soon, but that’s okay, because’—she said’cause—‘Ienjoyed them’ sort of way.”
Amusement bumped up against his annoyance. “That’s very specific.”
“It’s very detailed, very accurate, because I pay attention, all reasons why I’m good at my job. Two more reasons are that I’m strong-minded and determined.” She turned to face him square on. “If you want to date me, Connor, you have to accept I have money. And I will spend it how I see fit.”
Was it wrong to be so turned on when she was basically confirming how out of his league she was? “Fine. But Ellie’s my daughter and my responsibility. If we can’t afford riding lessons, she doesn’t get them. And, yeah, it fucking hurts that I can’t always give her what she wants, but it’s life, and both of us have to suck it up.”
“How many more lessons can you afford?”
“Jesus, why don’t you cut off my balls and be done with it?”
She narrowed her eyes. “If the situation were reversed, that would be okay, though?”
He let out a frustrated breath. He got her point—if he had money, he’d want to shower her with it. “Yeah, okay, it’s male ego, pride. But when a guy’s constantly told how irresponsible he is, how thoughtless, pride is about all he has to hold on to.”
Her expression softened. “Your parents?”
“Yes, and they weren’t wrong. But I wasn’t going to let Amy hand her over to anyone else to look after.” Emotion lodged in his throat. “I promised Amy’s parents I’d take care of my daughter. It was bollocks, because they had to look after her while I worked at the bar, and I could never have afforded this place without their help, but you tell yourself whatever stories you can to get by.” Swallowing hard, he held her gaze. “I’ve never asked them, or anybody, for money, so you offering to pay for Ellie’s lessons... it rubs on a raw nerve.”
“Okay.” She eyed him speculatively, her expression both understanding and... shifty. “But do you really want Ellie to lose out on something she loves just because your pride will take a hit?”
“That’s... Christ, I don’t even know the word for it.Underhanded. Devious.”Sneaky.
“It’s a frank assessment of the situation.” She reached up and cupped his face, her expression softening. “I admire your principles, but this isn’t taking money from anyone. This is letting me give a girl I’m incredibly fond of something I know she will enjoy.”
It was hard to argue with that. “You know I can’t deny you anything, right?”
