“What different things?”
“I’d like to eventually get married again someday, and he’s determined to never get married.”
“So live in sin.It’s all the rage.It’s not even a sin anymore.”
“I know, but I don’t want to rule it out forever, and he’s not into it at all because of his parents and the things he sees in his work.We decided it’s easier to stop it before it really gets started, rather than set ourselves up for heartache in the future.”
“Huh.”
“Huh what?”
“Nothing… Even though I’ve had my concerns about the situation, it was nice to see you smiling again.It’s been a while since I saw you like that for reasons that don’t involve the kids.”
“It was nice while it lasted.”
“Is he still taking you to Santa Barbara?”
“Yes, he said he wanted to do that.We’re still friends.We’re just keeping it real.”
“Is that right?”
“What is it you’re really asking?”
“I might’ve been widowed for a long time, but what I walked in on the other night didn’t look like ‘just friends’ to me.”
“We had a really exciting and immediate connection.”
“Had?Past tense?”
“I mean… it’s still there, but we’ve decided to take a step back before it goes too far.”
“Are you sure that’s what you want?”
“Not really, but I can’t handle any more heartache.”
“Heartache has a way of finding you even when you’re trying to avoid it.”
Her friend’s words were devastating in their simple truth.Being with Julian could be heartbreaking.Being without him would be more so.That much she already knew for certain.However, she couldn’t and wouldn’t pressure him to change the rules he lived by for her.Nothing good could come of that either.The rules he’d set for himself had served him well thus far, and he’d stayed true to them for thirty-eight years.She had to respect that and find a way to move on.
If only she didn’t ache from head to toe when she thought about never being close to him again.
Today, she needed to focus on saying a final goodbye to Gabriel while trying to stay strong when it came to Julian.She appreciated that he wanted to help her through a difficult day and was determined not to make it worse than it already was by yearning for things that could never be.
Julian arrived right on time at two thirty, wearing a blue sport coat over a checked blue dress shirt and khaki pants.He looked so handsome that she had to curb her first impulse to hug and kiss him.
“You look beautiful,” he said with a hint of sadness in his voice that hadn’t been there before.
“Funny, I was thinking the same about you.”
Isla had worn a black wrap dress with matching heels.She’d spent extra time on her hair and makeup, hoping she looked dignified for her last moments with Gabriel.“This is surreal.I’m going to my dead husband’s wake with my former divorce attorney.Have you ever experienced that scenario in your practice?”
He replied with a small smile.“This entire situation is unprecedented in every possible way.”
Mrs.V came out of the kitchen.“Oh, hello, Julian.”
“Hi there, Mrs.Ventura.”
She handed a black sweater to Isla.“Don’t forget this.It’s apt to be chilly later.”
