Was he in love with her?
Probably, yet there was nothing he could do about it.
“I hate seeing you like this, Julian.It’s so unlike you as to be frightening.”
“I’m sorry to worry you.I’ll be okay.”
“What’s the worst thing that could happen if you allowed yourself to love this woman?”
His huff of laughter burst out of him.“Do I really need to list the worst things that could happen?We see the litany of things that can go wrong every damned day around here.”
“Oh please.Ninety-nine percent of that stuff would never apply to you.You’d never cheat on your wife or beat her up or try to steal her money or be abusive to her kids or get hooked on drugs or?—”
“You’ve made your point.”
“Have I?My point is that if you’re looking at what goes on around here, or even what went on between your parents back in the day, and thinking you need to deny yourself the experience of truly loving this woman and her children, then you’re not as smart as I’ve always thought you were.”
“There’re a lot of things far short of cheating or abuse that can doom a marriage.”
“Absolutely, but will you let your fear of those things stop you from fully living?From fully experiencing love and contentment and all the things?”
“I hate to point out that you’ve been perfectly content without being married.”
“I would’ve loved to have gotten married and had children.I never met anyone I loved enough to have those things with.If I had, I would’ve jumped on him.Literally.”
Julian laughed.“I’m sorry it didn’t happen for you.”
“My life is full of so many things, but I’ve never been truly in love.I’m not sure I would’ve been strong enough to turn away from that if it had happened.”
“I’m not sure I am either.”
“Then don’t.”She put her hands on his desk and leaned in.“Don’t spend the rest of your life yearning for what you let get away.I’d think that’d be worse than gambling on her and having it not work out.Regrets are a bitch, my love.Ask yourself how you’ll feel when your friend Denny tells you his beautiful sister is getting married again—to someone who isn’t you.”
Julian ran an absent hand over his abdomen, which felt as if it’d taken a direct hit from a closed fist.“Years ago, my siblings and I promised each other we’d never put ourselves in a situation like this.We promised we’d never get married, never turn over everything to another person who could ruin us in all the ways.”
“That’s a very stupid promise to make when you’re too young to know better.”
“We were old enough to know… We saw it firsthand.”
“My mother said once that no one knows what goes on inside a marriage except the two people in it.Whatever went down between your parents was something only they knew about, because to my knowledge, neither of them has ever said what led to their split.What they put you kids through was all about wanting to win and not about what was in the best interests of their children.Those of us who watched that happen have never forgiven them for that.”
Her expression was as earnest as he’d ever seen it.
“If you let what those two fools did keep you from the woman you love, then you’re a fool, too.And the one thing you’ve never been is a fool, Julian Remington.Don’t start now when the stakes are as high as they might ever be.”
“My siblings would never forgive me.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.Of course they will.You’re their hero.You led them through hell and have never wavered in your devotion to them.”
“I’m nobody’s hero.”
“Oh, Julian.Yes, you are.That you don’t even see it only proves my point.They’d never stand in the way of your happiness.”
“You missed your calling as an attorney.”
“I’ve been attorney-adjacent my entire adult life.I’ve learned a few things along the way, and the number one thing is that true love is rare and precious.Don’t have regrets, my love.They’re a bitch.”
With that parting shot, she turned and left him to think about everything she’d said and how desperately he wanted to follow her advice.
