“Do you want to talk about it?”
“He was the one who encouraged me to go to the library and get all those books. The library kind of stopped after he died. A lot of things stopped after he died. It was really hard on my mom, taking care of a new baby and me, and trying to work at the same time.”
“I can’t imagine the stress she was under.”
“I was a difficult kid. I was always acting out in school, causing trouble. Shoplifting, even. In high school, I felt like I had to own up to some of it. Now, I just want Sierra to have the opportunities I didn’t. She wants to go to Yale, but I’d be happyif she went to even just community college. I don’t want her to have the mountain of student debt that I have.”
“Your Mom must be proud of you now.”
“I think she’s just glad I didn’t end up in juvenile detention and have a job,” he sighs. “She didn’t want me to leave Allagash. She thinks Sierra needs another authoritative figure in her life.”
“I’m sure Sierra will be okay with just your mom.”
“That’s what I said. But I guess they’re having problems…with Sierra drinking and going out.”
“That’s not your fault though. She could have done that with you there anyway.”
“Still, it’s hard not to accept responsibility for it. I can’t help but feel like if I had stayed, she’d be better off.”
“But you like York Falls, right?” I ask.
“I do. I love York Falls. It’s closer to the city, more things to do.”
“More bookstores to browse. More books to buy.” I smile.
“But I can’t help but feel like Sierra is still partially my responsibility. I owe it to my mother, regardless of what I want.” He gives me a squeeze, holding me tighter and tighter. “Let’s get back in the van.”
“I thought you’d never ask.” I shiver. Back in the van, after de-icing our eyeballs and eyebrows, we stare at the map on Dean’s phone. Four hours to Caribou and we need to figure out a place to stay the night.
“Is there like, a Holiday Inn Express?” I ask.
Dean pans around the map. “There is not, like a Holiday Inn Express.”
“What about a regular Holiday Inn?”
“Nope.”
“A DoubleTree?” I suggest.
“Nada.”
“Best Western.”
“There’s two in Canada. Do you have your passport?” Dean looks at me expectantly.
“What about La Quinta?” I ask.
“Try again.”
“Okay, well, what is there?”
“Ralph’s Motel,” Dean reads from the screen.
“Do we have any other options?”
“Unless you want to sleep in the back of the van. Ralph’s has 4.3 stars on Google Reviews. That’s gotta count for something in your book, right?” Dean asks.
“Yeah…let me read the comments.”
