“Stan,” I say, scolding him as well. “Please remain focused on the road.”
He laughs, but he at least faces forward. “Yes, doc.”
Lix clears his throat and resumes massaging my shoulders with more care than before.
His thumbs press into a tense spot near my shoulder blade, easing it with patient pressure.
“You okay?” he whispers.
I rub my abdomen again. “I am,” I answer truthfully. “Thank you both for coming with me to this appointment.”
Stan’s voice floats in as I close my eyes and relax. “Like we’d miss this, Em.”
I melt under Lix’s hands as we drive deeper into town, toward the office where the doctor will let us know if we’ll be naming the life inside me after their father or my mother. Two people who mean an astounding amount to me, but can’t be here for different reasons.
A small, bitter smile spreads across my cheeks as I try not to cry. I tell myself that it’s hormones, but I also remind myself that it’s alright to feel. It’s expected. It’s okay. It’s normal.
Soon, Stan parks us at the clinic.
The engine cuts, and for a moment the car ticks as it cools, spring air drifting in when Stan opens his door.
I open my eyes and see the clinic’s brick façade. The sight looks familiar now, no longer an unknown variable after visiting it a few times the past month.
Lix is moving before I can undo my seatbelt. “Easy,” he whispers, opening my door and offering his hand.
“I’m quite capable of exiting a vehicle,” I tell him, but I take his hand anyway because it makes him smirk.
Stan opens the clinic door, holding it wide with a flourish. “After you, my loves!”
Inside, the air smells faintly of disinfectant and something floral meant to soften it. The reception desk is staffed by the same associate we’ve seen every visit, large glasses low on her nose.
“Morning, you three,” she says with a polite smile. “Always good to see you all.”
“Mornin’ to you too, Ann,” Stan replies warmly, as though they’re old friends. “How’s the new grandbaby? Sleeping through the night yet?”
Her face lights up. “He slept so well yesterday after we gave him some warm milk and something sweet.”
“Oh no,” Stan says, putting his sunglasses up. “He’s manipulating hearts at that tiny age? Must run in the family. Who’s the sly one in yours? Don’t tell me it’s you!”
Lix stays close to my side while Stan continues to chat, and Ann manages to check us in with some swift clicks on her keyboard.
When we’re directed to the waiting area, Lix guides me toward the chairs. As soon as I’m seated, he hands me some water.
As I drink, his hand finds mine, fingers threading together.
Stan paces lightly, chatting with a nurse about her upcoming vacation, and congratulating an expecting couple across the room.He even tries to convince them to name their unborn child after him, making me laugh and lean on Lix.
He squeezes my hand. “Still okay there, Em?” he whispers.
“Yes,” I answer. “There’s this feeling of heightened anticipatory response, but it’s within tolerable parameters, considering I’m pregnant.”
He smiles at that, kissing my cheek. “That means you’re excited, right?”
“I am,” I admit, smiling back at him.
The door to the back hallway opens, and the doctor steps out, clipboard tucked under her arm. “Emira?” she calls, eyes finding me. “And your entourage.”
Stan straightens. “That’s us!”
