“You did it!” Aunt Addy exclaimed the moment I walked into her room at the rehab center.
I glanced at the nurse who was taking her vitals and then back at my aunt. “Good morning to you, too.”
She laughed, and the sound made me smile.
“How are you?” I asked her. “How are you feeling?”
She looked tired, but there was excitement in her eyes. “I’ll be better once you tell me about your date.”
I waited until the nurse was fully out the room before I said anything. “So, he picked me up and took me to a botanical garden, and then we went to lunch. After lunch we went to the river to talk, and then we stopped by his parents’ house so he could get his stuff, and he dropped me off before he headed out of town.”
Her eyes widened. “You met his parents?!”
“I met his mom.”
With a crooked grin, she gestured to her notepad on her tray table. “Get my paper for me, please.” After I picked it up, she continued. “Go to your list, and put a star besidedating.”
“It was a date, but we aren’t dating. We’re friends,” I explained to her. “He has a busy schedule coming up, and I don’t know what I want right now, so…”
“Datingmeans multiple dates,” she continued, as if she didn’t hear me. “When is the next one?” She nodded knowingly. “I have a good feeling about him.”
Aunt Addison grilled me with questions about Lamar and the date, and I gladly answered, leaving out only the part where he’d bent me over and taken care of my needs.
She closed her eyes and exhaled. “I want to get started on my list as soon as I’m out of here.”
“Absolutely. We can get the calendar out and plan out how we’re going to execute your list by the end of the year.”
When her eyes opened, she gave me a look. “Youhave until the end of the year. I need to do this by the end of the summer. The sooner, the better.”
The physical therapist walked in before I had a chance to respond. My aunt flashed me a smile and then turned toward the medical team.
Silently, I sat down out of the way and shook off the undertones of our conversation. I rationalized why she’d said it, and I took a deep breath. We’d said we were making lists for the summer.
That’s all.
She’d said I needed to get out of my comfort zone, and I agreed. She was going to check my list, and I was going to check hers. We were going to plot out how we were going to have the most memorable summer we’d had in years. We had plans.
Tears burned my eyes. I blinked rapidly as I pulled a book out of my bag. Pushing down my emotions, I focused on losing myself in the murder-mystery storyline.
Every day was different, but I tried to convince myself that Aunt Addy was getting better. I would peek over my book and watch her follow the directions as best she could. I would eat cafeteria food, play card games, and reminisce with her, and then I would go back to her house and get sad. Then I’d repeat the process the next day.
Addison Payne radiated light, and seeing her light dim broke my heart.
For the rest of the week, I didn’t talk to Aaliyah and Nina outside of a few texts here and there. I didn’t talk to Lamar because he was on the trip with his friends. I didn’t talk to anyone as I watched my aunt decline in a few days’ time.
On Friday morning, as I drove to the rehab center, it hit me that I hadn’t heard from Lamar in days. He texted me to let me know he made it, and then a few hours later, he said they were going jet skiing. Unfortunately, I hadn’t heard from him since. I knew he was with his friends, and he was under no obligation to keep in contact with me.
But still.
Jazmyn Payne:I hope you’re having a good time! Don’t forget to send me pictures from Burj Khalifa!
I squeezed my eyes shut after I sent that text.Am I doing too much? Is this thirsty?
He had been on my mind since he dropped me off, and while I was sitting in the car outside the rehab center, I couldn’t help but check in with him. My body clenched with desire as the flashbacks hit me in waves, but last night’s dream had been the most intense.
I’d initiated conversation because I wanted to talk to him. And while that was reason enough to reach out, selfishly, I also wanted the distraction.
Even though he hadn’t initiated contact since Monday.
