Why is the world against me?
I tell myself the only reason I follow him to his car is because of Oreo. Her loud, vibrating purrs will soothe my anxiety about what’s bound to be a very expensive and unexpected repair bill. I know I’ve been biding my time with my car, but I love it too much to let it go. And new vehicles, or at least new tomeones, are expensive. Janel told me that she and her husband both have car payments upward of seven hundred dollars a month each.
Seven.Hundred!
I could never. I will learn the bus schedule and pay my dues to the Fairbanks public transit before I ever get something that equals my rent.
“Care to explain why you’re pissed at me this time?” Moskins asks, breaking me from my faraway thoughts. “I’m losing track of reasons. Last time, it was because I inadvertently got you pulled from the shelter event and then made you come against the wall in apology. What did I dothistime?”
Flaming heat works its way up my face and settles under the skin in my cheeks. “Is that what that was? A pity orgasm to shut me up?”
He huffs out a laugh. “It was a lot of things, sweetheart. But it did work, didn’t it?”
My chest tightens as I stare out the window and listen to Oreo in the back seat. She doesn’t seem very happy being stuck in her crate, and I’m right there with her.
“I’m so glad I could help contribute to your quota of pity fucks this year. Your charity work knows no bounds,” I reply sarcastically, staring out the window and praying that traffic doesn’t slow us down. The quicker I’m out of this car, the better.
Unfortunately for me, there’s a long line of red lights that really seem to love us as we approach them. One after another, the greens turn yellow, which then turns into the same color as the flags I seem to attract the most.
Bright-ass red.
“There’s one problem with that assessment,” he remarks, not seeming fazed at all by my biting tone. His casual nonchalance pisses me off that much more.
I deadpan, hating the knot in my chest that feels a lot like jealousy, “And what would that be?”
“I haven’t fucked you yet, Winter.”
I suck in a sharp breath at the words that soak in a little too deeply.
He hasn’t fucked meyet. That three-letter word grabs hold of me for dear life, and I hate how much it stirs something inside my lower gut.
Yet.
His lips quirk into a knowing smile. “Do you like the sound of that?” he guesses, studying me as we wait for the light to change. It’s not an actual question he needs an answer to. “If you want to get to know me, here’s a fact. I don’tfuckout of pity. I fuck to feel good. I fuck so my partner feels good. Ifuckbecause I like it, and I like it when my partner does too.”
He’s not looking at me as he drives, but I know his eyes are intense as they focus on the road. His fingers are wrapped tightly around the steering wheel—the skin is pulled taut around his knuckles and white. His jaw grinds, and a slight tic of his jaw tells me that he’s holding back a lot more than he’s saying.
And what I may hate more than my reaction to his initial statement is the way my heart leaps in my chest when he says the word “fuck” like it’s a prayer.
His mouth wraps around the word like I imagine it wrapped around my—
Oh my God.
“Stop,” I blurt, not sure if I’m talking to myself or him.
“Stop what?” he asks, still grasping the wheel tightly as we drive down the long stretch of Main Street. “Stop the car? Stop telling you the truth? You’re the one who wants to get to know me, so I’m letting you know who I am. I’m a man who has a healthy appetite for sex. I have no shame about that. I love the feeling of sinking my cock into a wet pussy. I love the sound that women make when they come around me. I love—”
I swallow past the lump in my throat as I fidget in the front seat. “Stop talking like that,” I cut him off, feeling my heart drum wildly in my chest.
“Can’t handle it?” he challenges.
My nostrils flare as I finally look in his direction. “Do you ever feel like a jackass hearing yourself talk, or do you get off on it since you love the feeling so much?”
To my surprise, some of that intensity melts into amusement. “Who says it can’t be both?”
I shake my head and wrap my arms around my stomach in a hug to keep my hands from fidgeting. “You may have no shame, but that doesn’t mean I have to be like you. I can feel bad about—” I cut myself off before admitting to him the reason I’m mad.
The annoying green monster nags at my soul after seeing him slip that piece of paper into his back pocket earlier. After watching Kayleigh, who’s notorious for being a little too friendly with people, all but grope him all day, it was hard to watch him flirt with the pretty photographer.
