“Phile is both a girl’s name and a boy’s name. I think it should be the name of your first child—Farrin agrees with me.” Phile fled to the palace, a spring in her step and a cackle in her throat.
Farrin frowned at her back, his black eyebrows slanting down sharply in his displeasure. He looked at Rakel and opened his mouth.
A giggle of laughter escaped her. “I know.”
His frown turned into a soft smile as he slipped his arms around her. For a few luxurious moments, Rakel leaned against him, basking in the warmth of his love as he pressed his lips to her forehead, then down to her cheek, then down to her jaw.
“We need to talk,” he whispered in her ear.
She flinched and pulled back from him. “Farrin…”
“You almost died, Rakel. This isn’t something we can smooth over as if it never happened. These have been the longest months of my life.” His gray eyes were still warm with love, but the furrowing of his brow and the set of his mouth created an expression of pain.
“I don’t regret it.”
“You should have told me what you were planning.”
“If I did, you would have stopped me.” Rakel lifted her chin. “You—and others—would have done everything in your power to keep me from carrying everything out.”
Farrin raised an eyebrow at her. “So what if we had?”
“You cannot deny that my actions created the best possible outcome.”
“I can, actually.”
The response made Rakel’s jaw drop. “In what way did it fail?” she demanded.
“It didn’t fail, but because you and Phile ruthlessly pushed your strategy forward, alone, we’ll never know what sort of ideas we could have used instead.”
Rakel uneasily knit her hands together. “What do you mean?”
“I mean if you had explained your idea, we could have discussed it with other magic users. Ragnar’s elf-friends might have been able to offer knowledge that would have made the transfer of your magic easier. There is a magic user who used to belong in Kavon’s unit—when you defeated Tenebris, she deserted the Chosen and now lives in Verglas. Her powers revolve around amplifying the magic of others. She might have been able to help if you had separated your two self-inflicted missions and given us time to react. Therewereother possibilities, Rakel. So why did you do it?”
“We didn’t have time for any of that. Spring had arrived,” she argued.
“That’s a flimsy excuse. Why?”
Rakel said nothing.
Farrin sighed. “Do you know howhorrifyingit was to see you crumple on the battlefield? I swore to protect you with my life; Iloveyou, and you shut me out with an impenetrable ice blockade while you withered and fell. I will live with that memory for the rest of my life. Please, Rakel…why?”
Rakel’s chin trembled before she regained control of her emotions. “I was afraid,” she said in a tiny voice.
Farrin tilted his head. “Of?”
“Being like Tenebris.”
“Oh,princess.” Farrin spoke the title with passionate affection, and Rakel knew he wasn’t calling her a princess of Verglas, buthisprincess. He engulfed her in another warm, protective hug.
Rakel shut her eyes and leaned into his shoulder. Ever since she had woken up, her head had swum with all the changes—the void where her magic used to be, the minty feeling of it always surrounding her, and the changes among her friends.Nothingwas the same.Except for Farrin. She took a shuddering breath and fought her tears. In spite of everything that had happened, Farrin’s eyes were still bright with love, and his embrace felt like the strongest shield in the world.
“I wanted to prove that I wasn’t like him.” Rakel swallowed when a hot tear splashed her cheek. “That I was doing this because I wanted to save people—not because I wanted power.”
“Rakel, you didn’t need to sacrifice yourself to prove you aren’t like Tenebris. You do that just by breathing,” Farrin said.
“But we were so similar,” Rakel argued. She clung to him as if he were her lifeline, but she couldn’t look up to see his expression. “We both had more magic than a person should possess; we both recruited repressed people, and we fought for a causewedeemed worthy.”
Farrin slid one of his hands into her hair. “Being good is a choice; it’s a choice you made when you set out to save a country that scorned you. You might have power—which can often be corrupted—and the praise of men, but from the start, you have held out your hand to help and save.”
