“Do you think…did I just ruin everything?” sheasked.
“No,” he said in the same self-assured voice he always used. “You are frightened, and he is hurt. You both blindly struck out. Give himspace.”
Angelique nodded and wandered in the direction of the kitchen, intending to make some tea. But the cat’s words confused her.Evariste is hurt? Aboutwhat?
* * *
Idon’t needanything fromyou!
The words struck Evariste with the force of a sword in the prime of itsswing.
Remembering her narrowed eyes and the fire in her gaze only increased hispain.
Knowingly or not, Angelique had uttered the very words he never wanted to hear. She was rejecting him. She didn’t want him and obviously did not see him as anything…more.
He groaned as he sank to his knees, barely taking in hissurroundings.
Without thinking, he had opened a portal to Farset, near Emerys’ AlabasterForest.
He rubbed his eyes and wished he could take the last hourback.
Angelique had hurt him, yes, but he knew he was lashing out unfairly when he accused her of cowardice. He was her teacher—he was supposed to be above suchtactics.
As much as Angelique’s words hurt, there was nothing inherently wrong with them. He was her master—a close companion but certainly nothing more thanthat.
Clovicus was right. Angelique was incapable—at the moment—of falling in love. She wasstunted.
The pain and accusations she had lived through had left her warped. Or perhaps it was better to compare her to an animal that had been abused and was now a little slower to trust. And instead of waiting patiently for her to come to him, Evariste had tried to tip Angelique’shand.
He didn’thaveto recommend she become an enchantress yet. She could remain his apprentice for easily another three or four years before most would expect her to take her evaluation. And while she was a bright student, there were other subjects they could dig deeper into in the interim. (They never had really studied curses, and she could use more practice with her healingmagic.)
But no. Evariste selfishly wanted to walk with her, not as her teacher but as something more. He had pushed for her test when she clearly was not yet ready to face her warmagic.
I hurt her because she acted exactly as Clovicus predicted she would.He sighed.It’s not her fault I feel this way for her and she does not reciprocate—or even see it. I am the one at fault for rushing her for personal reasons instead of thinking firstly ofher.
The snow (that was on the cusp of slush thanks to the warmer temperatures as winter eased off) seeped through Evariste’s pants in an unwelcome and icy reminder of where hewas.
I hurt her.“I have to bury my feelings deeper. I have to do better,” he grimly said. “If I don’t shape up, she might break all ties withme.”
I don’t need anything fromyou!
Evariste groaned as the words hammered at him again, only proving hispoint.
Angelique was not nearly as attached to him as he was to her. And if he tried to push her too far, their relationship would neverrecover.
That was an outcome he couldn’t live with.I’d rather have her friendship than nothing atall.
He sighed. “How can I face her again?” he wondered. “How can I restore us to the way we were? Is it even possible?” He sank his fists into the slushy snow. “I need…time.”
But as Evariste stared at the snow-dusted trees, he knew one thing in his heart: he wasneveragaingoing to do anything to jeopardize his relationship with Angelique because of his feelings forher.
Chapter 29
Aweek passed,followed by a second. Snow made a ruthless return, and the yard outside Evariste’s home was white, but the sun was stronger during thedaytime.
Spring was fighting to poke through the last gasps ofwinter.
And yet Evariste andI…
