That he was here with me.
Blaise only released his breath when I settled back against him, nuzzling carefully beneath his jaw, tears threatening to spill from my eyes.
“Ambrose and I were hired by a nest of vampires,” Blaise said quietly. “The job wasn’t very specific. They just said they needed trained muscle for a while. Because we were together so much, we kept our abilities to read emotions dampened when we weren’t feeding, otherwise it would drive us insane. So, we didn’t feel the deadly hunger in the air. We realized something was wrong far too late. Not until one of them had already taken a chunk out of my neck. And Ambrose...” Blaise swallowed, his scar shifting against my temple. “He was like an avenging angel. He plunged the crypt into a darkness so unnatural that evenI couldn’t see through it. But I could hear the screaming. The sound of flesh tearing.”
A fresh spill of tears slid down his cheek as he got lost in the memory.
“When it was over, he just stood there, trapped in that rage. Too consumed by it to realize I was okay. For the most part, anyway.” He huffed a weak, humorless breath. “I summoned my shadows and brought us back to our apartment. But even then... it was like he couldn’t quite believe I was still there.”
I felt it then—the truth pressing in. My body tensed as my mind screamed what I already knew but hadn’t fully realized, ever since Blaise had first spoken his best friend’s name.
My mate was in love with Ambrose.
And this was the night he’d realized it.
“I was already healing,” Blaise continued softly. “But Ambrose couldn’t seem to believe it without touching me. And—fuck.” He threaded a hand through his hair. “Gods, I wanted him to.”
He fell silent, gathering himself.
“We crossed a line that night,” he said finally. “One there was no coming back from. One I didn’twantto come back from. I thought... maybe Ambrose felt the same. But the next morning, he blamed the bloodlust and the aphrodisiac in the vampire venom. I didn’t push him. He seemed to regret it so much, and I didn’t want to make it worse.”
I felt him chew on his bottom lip.
“So, we drifted apart,” he said quietly. “We stopped feeding together. Took safe, boring jobs we didn’t have to work as a team on. And we avoided each other as much as we could.” His breath hitched. “Which is why he’s on a job helping a witch with a hob... and why I’m here with you.”
Silence stretched between us. Was he disappointed? Did he wish he’d never taken the job with me? Did he wish—
“I don’t want you to think I regret meeting you, Caitlyn,” he said, cutting through my spiraling thoughts.
I felt his gaze turn down to me, but I couldn’t bring myself to look up. He pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead.
“From the moment I opened the door of your beat-up car and saw those beautiful hazel eyes, I was a goner,” he murmured. “My heart opened to you instantly. And I can’t even begin to tell you how excited I am to explore what we could be together. I just... need time,” he finished softly. “Time to forget Ambrose.”
Forget Ambrose.
I should have felt relieved. Thrilled, even, that he wanted to move on, to choose me fully. Instead, my mind betrayed me with another fleeting mental snapshoot of the three of us in that tent.
I smothered the thought instantly.
Ambrose was fated to a Briar Coven witch. Maybe even my cousin, Jen. Or worse—Priscilla, if the coven’s magic ever finally accepted her. I wondered how much it would hurt Blaise to see his former lover walking around the coven arm in arm with someone else when Ambrose was eventually summoned.
Would we have to leave the coven for good?
The thought made my chest ache. But the idea of putting my mate through that kind of pain hurt even more.
I drew in a steadying breath.
This whole situation was aroyalshit show.
But I had to trust that Fate had played her hand this way for a reason.
I eased myself out of the crook of Blaise’s neck. His eyes were still red-rimmed and puffy from the Wailing Whirls, his lower lip caught between his teeth as he waited for me to say something. All my body wanted to do was show him—in every way I knew how—that he never had to fear being vulnerable with me.
I lifted my hand and cupped his jaw.
“Thank you for telling me,” I said softly. “And I never doubted your feelings for me.” My thumb brushed gently along his cheek. “What you had with Ambrose doesn’t change how I feel about you. And you don’t need to be sorry for any of it, Blaise.”
Chapter 19. Blaise
