Confusion crashes through my head. We don’t know who the father of her child is yet. It’s our way that we share the women, but she shouldn’t be with Nolan… not like this. Not in these circumstances. Not until it’s verified that it’s his child. I clench my teeth together, holding my breath. Based on my father’s lack of reaction, I can’t tell whether he completely missed seeing Twenty-Two in Nolan’s bed or— No. Nothing else makes sense. This isn’t good. It’s a definite breach of the rules that have always been in place.
“Finneas,” Nolan grits out. “Arrow told me you’d returned.” His keen eyes assess the state of the man at my side, traveling over him from head to toe. “Looks like we have more than one of you in need of my attention tonight. I expect we’ll discuss things later.”
My father nods, pressing his lips together. “Check Kiefer’s boy over first.”
We remain where we are while Nolan takes a minute to shine a light into Malakai’s eyes, then nods. “Concussed.” After that, he spends some timeprodding at the back of his head. More than once in that process, Mal audibly sucks in air through his teeth. “You’re gonna have a whopper of a headache for a while. I’ll give you some meds.”
As Nolan finishes up, from behind us Kiefer spits, “Well, shit,” his tone laced with astonishment. “It’s nice of you to finally rejoin us.” My father simply eyes his longtime friend and allows the rant to continue. “But hey, at least you’re among the living. We weren’t certain.”
Bristling at my side, Finneas growls, “Don’t know, Kiefer. Perhaps I was foolish to assume you’d step up and make sure the bridge got repaired.” The muscle at the back of his jaw jerks as he stares down the other man. “I. Fucking. Waited.”
“Shit like that takes time, or have you forgotten how long it took us to construct that bitch twenty years ago?” Kiefer’s brow raises. The tension between them is thick as the ever-present morning fog around here when his eyes suddenly dart to the others. “Son, what in the fuck happened to you?” Kiefer’s voice is rough and gritty as he charges forward, reaching Malakai in a few long strides.
“Don’t know.” Malakai shifts slightly, turning, and his eyes widen when it registers that he has the full attention of not only his father but also Finneas.
My eyes meet Cross’s, as I slowly walk over to join him. He shakes his head in response to the questioning look I shoot him and shrugs but wisely doesn’t voice his opinion of anything aloud. Not yet. Instead, heswipes a sponge over Mal’s back, mopping up some of the blood.
Nolan gestures to the other exam room. “Finn, we’ll head in there for some privacy.” He catches Cross’s attention with a jut of his chin. “Can you finish up with Mal? Throw a couple stitches in there, like I taught you.”
“Yes, of course.” Cross squeezes the sponge into the waiting bucket before rinsing it out and going again.
“I can help,” I offer, “just let me know what I can do.”
Nolan is already backing toward the other room, but then he stops and chuckles. “Attempt to clean the mess out of his hair first, but frankly, I think it should be cut short. It certainly would make it easier to monitor the healing process,” he rumbles.
Malakai’s head swings around on his neck, and he blinks like an owl. It’d be funny, but I know the asshole and his father have had words about the fact that he’s kept his hair long since his arrival while the rest of us are made to have frequent trims. This has the potential to go sideways fast.
Kiefer leans in, staring straight into Malakai’s eyes before reaching out and tugging on a damp clump of hair hanging in his son’s face. “Agreed. It needs to be cut.”
Malakai rears back, glaring at his father, then Nolan, too, for good measure. “Fuck. And. No.”
In a flash, Finneas grabs his chin,harshly jerking his head. The agony that rips from Mal’s lips makes me shudder. “You are a breath away from spending the night in one of the cells. Watch yourself. You’re lucky I have better things to do right now.”
The three of us remain silent for several awkward beats after the Collective leave the room. Scrubbing a hand over my face, I can’t help but wonder what the real story of my father’s disappearance is. I’m certain he lied to my brothers and me… and I have a sneaking suspicion I know why, but I don’t know if he’ll ever admit it.
Only two people know the truth, and I believe Delilah might be one of them.
FIVE
ARROW
It’s late.There’s no way I’m sleeping, but it’s not like that’s anything new. Unfortunately, I do seem to be picking up more things that plague my mind as time trudges forward. I lift the cider pilfered from my father’s stock to my lips and swallow deeply, already regretting my decision to run in the Hunting. The way my healing skin pulls with every movement isn’t the only reason I’m drinking. Dulling my thoughts as well seems wise.
What horrific events and memories will my nightmares feature tonight if I do manage to fall asleep? Finneas’s return, perhaps, or what might transpire when he learns of the exact reason for my correction? Maybe I’ll get twisted up in the warped thoughts that’d sent me into a spiral when I found Malakai all but dead. I grimace as a sick feeling knots in my gut.
There’s no doubt I’ll spend the entire nightworrying over my siren after the way her tears and frustration had taken a dull axe to my heart. She’s never far from my thoughts as it is. She has a name.Delilah.I whisper it to myself, liking the way it sounds, and that distracts me, but only for a moment before I get caught up in my head again.
As I swallow more of the potent brew, my already burdened mind twists, replaying snippets from earlier—things I saw, things I heard. Things I was told.Finneas.According to Cross, he found my siren out there in the woods. My brow furrows, trying to imagine how that went down. And it wasn’t even just our missing leader that’d come upon Delilah. I can’t blink without seeing an image of Dragan with his hands around her neck.
No, I didn’t actually witness the assault. Maybe I wouldn’t have put two and two together if Cross hadn’t mentioned how Dragan had been standing over her when he and Hayze came upon them. I believe those bruises I saw on her delicate skin were at least partially inflicted by that asshole’s hands. He’ll pay for touching her. And so will anyone else who seeks to harm her.
Drawing in one breath after another does nothing to calm me, because in my head, all I can see is Dragan with a devious grin tipping the corners of his mouth, no care for the damage he’s done. He’s just like the rest of them—Finneas, Kiefer, Nolan, and even my own father. They don’t consider anything other than theirown greedy desires. Nothing will change while the Collective is in control of the way we’re required to act, think, and even feel.
This way of life has been so deeply ingrained in me that every time a shred of contrary thought enters my mind, it rubs from the inside out until I can’t help but pay attention. All the things I’ve been taught since the day I was born lie in direct opposition to the way I wish this life was. I don’t have a clue how to stop the war that rages inside my own skull. Every day, I hide the intrusive thoughts. Soon, they’re gonna eventually bubble free and land me in the thick of something I can’t handle on my own.
Pushing the door to the cellar pantry open a crack, it hovers at the edge of my mind that I should cross the main room and creep down the hallway to where my siren lies on the stone floor in the cell we were told to put her.Do I dare?I blink into the dark. There are probably still several hours until dawn when the compound awakens. I shouldn’t be down here at all. But where else would I be when she’s here?
Earlier, I told her I’d come back. And everything in me screams that I need her, that I should sayfuck the consequences. I don’t care what happens to me. But her? I’d rather cut off my own arm than hurt her again. That’s the only reason I’m hesitating. Rolling my shoulders, I grit my teeth against the pain that serves as a reminder of what I cost us that night. Me. Her. Hayze and Malakai. Even Cross. My indiscretions willforever be emblazoned on my skin. And what it did to her… it makes me sick thinking about it.
