His breathing was steady, like Thad himself, which was oddly reassuring.Maybe he already knows, I thought. But if he didn’t, I prayed Thad dug deep, and soon. Because if Thad was right, and today’s miss wasn’t random, then he had exactly ten days to change his luck.
And my charts couldn’t help with that.
CHAPTER
57
THAD
DAY 356, DAWN
The Naming Wall looked different now.
New names, belonging to faces I didn’t know. Spaces filled by hands that weren’t mine, on days I wasn’t here. Quan had a check. It seemed to right the balance. Heesham sported a fresh check, too, which felt better than good. Elia had a cross, which sucked. So did Sergio. I wondered why. He had plenty of time. Or did.
One space looked exactly the same: mine. No cross, no check. The crosses around me looked sinister, like they were conspiring to birth one beside me, Nil jonesing to win her twisted version of tic-tac-toe.
No, I thought, glaring at the space beside my name.You won’t win.Part of me had the perverse urge to carve a check next to my name right now, but it would accomplish nothing. It wouldn’t bring a gate. It wouldn’t guarantee that I’d live.
Then my eyes fell on Ramia’s name. The rising sun hit her cross, setting it on fire, then I blinked and the illusion was gone. I stared at Ramia’s cross, unable to look away.
“Come on.” Charley’s voice broke my Wall thrall. She gently drew me away. “Everybody’s ready.”
Behind her, Jason flashed me a thumbs-up. Miya stood beside him. Rives was talking to Dex, his new Second.
Charley’s hand in mine, I walked over to the group.
Dex stuck out his hand. Tattoos covered his chest and arms like a long-sleeved shirt, dark and tribal. His outstretched forearm boasted a massive cross sprouting flames.
“Good luck out there,” he said. “Run fast.”
I stared at his burning cross as I shook his hand. “Will do,” I said. Consumed by fire and fear, by flaming gates and burning crosses and by the infernal nature of Ramia’s predictions, my brain threatened to implode.
Dex’s strong grip brought me back. “I’m serious, mate. Run fast. Get yourself back home. For you, for all of us.” He released my hand and looked at Charley. “Be careful, Charley,” Dex said. “Protect your boy, and watch your back as well. It can get a bit crazy out there, you know?”
“I know.” She smiled. “See you, Dex. Stay alert and take care of each other.”
She’d be a great Leader, I realized, if Nil didn’t steal her first, like Talla. Or Sergio. The firestorm in my head grew.
Jillian squeezed my arm. “You’ll make it, Thad. I believe in you.”
“Thanks.”But it’s not up to me. Not my game, not my choice. My destiny wasn’t my own, and I hated it.
I was wired so tight I thought I might snap. Break, then shatter—into a million bone bits, doomed to stay forever, but I knew that’s what Nil wanted, and I refused.
I would not crack.
And yet part of me wondered if I already had, at least a little. Nil was screwing with my head, like she’d been for almost a year—and yesterday she’d drilled a little deeper, hitting another nerve. At the Flower Field, for a minute, Nil let me think I’d escape. I’d actuallybelieved I’d made it, only for Nil to snatch victory away using a half dead cat. I’d stayed up half the night wondering if Nil would spend the next ten days toying with me, only to claim victory in the end.
Charley was wrong about the carvings, at least about the lines. The target was on my chest, dead center, and I’d never felt more like prey. After all, that was why Nil brought us here. We were Nil’s sport, Nil’s fun. It was that simple.
As we loaded our gear, I took a final look at the Wall. Empty spaces taunted me, like gravestones hungering for a final date.
You’ll make it, Jillian had said.
Staring at those empty spaces, I hoped we all made it. But I knew we all wouldn’t. The Wall said it all.
Plus, Nil was full of all those damn cats.
