“Are you questioning my stamina, Your Grace?”
If her cheeks had the capacity to get even redder, they deployed that certain ability right then.
“Because I should think,” his voice turned into that low purr that undid her last night, “that you of all people would know that my stamina was never under question.”
Arabella, very inelegantly, choked on her tea.
“Gerald!”
“Yes?”
He was smiling a teasing smile, and no matter how Arabella tried to glare at him, she could all but smile back.
“As I said, my sister’s engagement party is coming soon,” Gerald threw a cold bucket of water over them. “And we need to be prepared.”
“I understand that this is a very important occasion in a family’s life, but you seem more anxious than I would expect from such a common occurrence.”
Gerald lost all his playfulness and looked at her as if he were trying to deduce how to proceed with his thoughts. He was simply trying to evaluate how much he could share with her. How safe it was.
Arabella felt hurt and, honestly, a little insulted. Of course, they hadn’t started their relationship on the right foot, but she would think that she had never given any reason for the Duke to doubt her. And she wouldn’t stay idly by to see him distrust her so.
“Must I remind you, Your Grace, that we are a married couple. We did give an oath, such as it was.”
Very subtly, Arabella was asking him to trust her. He studied her a bit, and she could see that he was struggling with emotion. The ruthless Duke was mostly alone and trusted virtually no one but himself, but now he found himself in a tight spot, needing her help.
“I need to explain to you more about my family, perhaps,” he said after he seemed to reach a compromise between necessity and fear.
“I am listening. Keep in mind that I am well aware that most families hide secrets they do not wish others to know.”
She saw his look get heavy as if he was telling her that she was presenting him with an understatement. Arabella decided to do what her role demanded, as they had divided them, and lighten the mood a little.
“But honestly now, how bad can this be?”
She regretted asking the question the moment she saw the look on his face. If she was expecting merely the fact that he was talking about his half-sister, his half-brother, and stepmother, she realized her mistake soon enough. It was worse than she could imagine.
It was all written in his tight expression, the mixture of anger and anxiety she saw on his face, and another layer that almost barred him from her. Something that was rooted deep into his psyche, stemming perhaps from his earlier years. Arabella was wise enough to know not to ask and simply waited for him to be ready.
“There is a reason why I don’t want to be at the engagement party or wedding unaccompanied and a bachelor,” Gerald explained.
He looked away out of the window, mustering his courage, gathering his thoughts, and taming his emotions. He seemed to be lost, and Arabella needed him to be with her in this breakfast room right now.
“It better be,” she said in a light tone. “You burst into my house, waving a ridiculous contract under our noses and demanding either my sister or me to marry you. And you are, in fact, married just because of that. It would be quite disappointing to think that I was dragged into this situation for a simple misunderstanding.”
His eyes instantly found hers, side-eyeing her with a faint smirk. It was so delightful to provoke him and see him respond. At the same time, Arabella saw a little glimpse of guilt in his eyes. It was as if he only now recognized that his personal problems had spilled into her life and now they were bound together for good.
Gerald exhaled and looked at her over the brim of his cup. They had shared their bodies, but that mattered little if he didn’t share more with her. Arabella, despite herself, admitted that she needed him to trust her.
She wouldn’t expect anything more from the Duke, not love, not affection. Perhaps desire, as he had shown her last night. But you could have that much with the man who was supposed to be her husband. Trust.
“The reason I need to appear in my sister’s engagement party and the wedding with a wife on my arm,” he started explaining.
He paused for a while and turned fully to her. It was bizarre to think that they had gone through so much, that they had given an oath before God and Crown, that they had tasted each other, joined together. And somehow this simple moment was also paramount.
“I am listening, Your Grace,” she prompted.
He took a deep breath and nodded to himself. Arabella had had quite a few victorious moments in her short social life, but nothing compared to this little nod. He was not completely opening up nor surrendering, but it was a glimpse of something more.
“I must appear with a wife so that I can avoid a scandal,” he breathed out.
