Once we’d both settled in, I finally explained. I told Quinn about Noah’s accident and his insistence that my past boyfriend loved him and the way his father had forsaken him in his time of need. “I knew he’d bond with you. Who wouldn’t? You’re an amazing guy. But look at your life. It’s big. It’s crazy. You have this amazing future right in front of you. And then look at me. Compared to you, I’m small and insignificant. It doesn’t take a big leap of the imagination to assume I’d be a passing phase for you. And if it had just been my heart on the line, I would’ve rolled the dice and risked it all, but it’s my baby’s heart too. I couldn’t let you crush it. Do you understand? It was never about disrespecting you and always about protecting my child.”
Quinn rose from his chair, laying his body across the table to reach my lips with his own. He dispensed a series of short, sweet pecks between the words he spoke. “You’re not small. You’re not insignificant. You’re brave and funny and exciting. Any guy would be lucky to have you. And I understand why you made the decision you did not to text me back. I can’t say I blame you. I’ll be honest with you, Jess, when I saw Noah, my first instinct was to bolt.”
I kept my expression neutral despite fighting off the feeling of impending doom. “It’s a lot, Quinn. I get it. And it’s obviously not what you signed up for.”
“No,” he agreed. “But am I what you signed up for? A McKallister? I know my backstory isn’t a slam dunk either.”
“Please—I’m sure you’ve never suffered with the ladies because of your lineage.”
“No. But you’re not just any lady. I can tell it freaks you out.”
He wasn’t wrong. But it wasn’t because of his family’s past; it was because of his family’s present. They were like royalty, and I was… well… me.
“I just have doubts they would accept me. I mean, what would they think of you dating a woman with a child?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never dated a woman with a child. Uncomplicated, remember?”
I smiled. “How could I forget?”
“Here’s the thing, Jess. I’ve had a lot of time to think about my uncomplicated girl policy, and I’ve come to the realization that I need complicated. I needyou. Everything else will work itself out. Noah. My family. You stealing my favorite t-shirt. The point is we owe it to ourselves to see where this goes. In twenty years, do you want us to look back and wonderwhat if?
“No,” I admitted. “I don’t want to live with regret. But it’s such a balancing act of doing what’s best for me and doing what’s best for him.”
“So, what’s best for you?” he asked.
I paused. Should I say it? Should I open up my heart to possible disaster? “You are, Quinn. Of course.”
“And what’s best for Noah? You have a lot of photo frames over there with just the two of you. Are you willing to expand your twosome?”
My heart fluttered at just the thought of what he was suggesting. The three of us, in a picture. A perfect little family.
“I’m willing… with hesitation. Listen, Quinn, I know you can’t promise me a future. I get that, and I’m willing to take this chance on us if you at least promise me that you’ll be gentle with Noah’s soul. If you can promise me that one thing, you can do whatever you want to mine. I always survive.”
He gripped my neck, his fingers tangling in my hair. “I will promise you that.”
I stood up and took his hand. “Good. Now that we have that out of the way, come with me… and bring the guitar.”
* * *
I stood with my back against the newly locked door, watching him with a predatory eye. I’d taken the liberty of changing into something more comfortable, which happened to be that damn Van Halen t-shirt he’d just accused me of stealing. The one I’d worn nearly every night since. He’d liked it so much the last time, I figured why mess with temptation?
“What do you have under there, Jess?” His voice was husky and tipped with lust.
“What I had last time.” I pulled on the hem, revealing a black lace thong and a matching bra.
“You weren’t wearing those last time,” he said, near drooling. “I would’ve remembered.”
Our eyes were locked in a battle of wits. Who would bend first? What did it matter? As long as we both got what we came here for, there would be no loser.
“I want you,” he said feverishly.
I stayed at the door, slightly arched so my breasts were prominently displayed. “Play for me.”
“Nah. I want to playwithyou.”
“Then play for me.”
He sighed. “Fine. But guitar only so I don’t wake Noah.”
