I groaned. How could this be so difficult? “With less enthusiasm and no aggression, Carl. Geez.” And then to Kyle, I said, “Relax. He’s trying to be friendly.”
“That was friendly?” Kyle replied in shock. “Seriously, I thought I was about to die.”
Carl raised his arms in defeat, stood up, and stomped off.
“Carl!” I called out to him.
“This is stupid.” He threw the angry words over his shoulder. “I’m never going to learn to be pleasant, so stop trying!”
TV Confessional
“I think that went well.”
—Kenzie
21
Kyle: Secret’s Out
About two weeksinto the game, Kenzie learned the truth about who I am. I hadn’t planned on telling her, but she had been honest, opening up her life to me, and I felt I owed her the same. That day, I’d been lying awake in the shelter, waiting for the first bits of light to peek out over the horizon. I loved this time of day, when everyone was still asleep.
Some days I’d just lie there and wait for the light to flood our camp and gradually wake the others around me. Other days I’d take a walk by myself. The sounds of the waves gently rolling up the beach and the rustling of the trees in the morning breeze were so relaxing. I couldn’t remember ever feeling so alive. I’d never really been one with nature before, but I was starting to understand its charms.
More often than not, I had Kenzie for company on my morning strolls. We’d grown close in the past couple of weeks. Out here, with nothing but time on our hands, we did a lot of just hanging out and talking. I’d never really had female friends, not close ones anyway, and I was digging having someone to really communicate with.
Talking to women was different than talking to men. It was acceptable to discuss important things with them. They encouraged it and didn’t call you a pansy-ass bitch if you got all gushy, like I did with my newfound fascination with nature. Kenzie didn’t think it was stupid. In fact, she told me I was evolving as a person, whatever that meant. I didn’t know if I would take it that far, but there was definitely a change in me. I was feeling more decisive and in control of my own life.
As much as we talked, though, I held back an important part of who I was from her. Maybe it was the cameras or maybe it was just the knowledge that once my secret was out there, I would no longer just be Kyle. I would again become an extension of my famous sibling… my connection to him seen as my only redeeming quality. Right now Kenzie and Dale and the others believed I was more than that, and I bristled at the thought of losing that feeling of inclusion.
“Kenzie?” I whispered to her sleeping frame. No response. My arms were around her waist, her head rested against my chest. We had become exceedingly comfortable with each other… sometimes too comfortable. More than once we’d woken up to my hard-on poking into her back. Yeah, that was always an awkward conversation. I’d had to explain, at least four times now, that it wasn’t her but my overactive sleep time imagination. Strangely enough, she didn’t seem too happy with my explanation, maybe because she knew I was lying. My hard-ons had everything to do with her. Kenzie had this way of burrowing herself into me like a prairie dog. Her shapely ass was always wiggling itself closer to me. I was a guy… what did she expect?
“Kenzie?” I spoke a bit more loudly, but this time added a finger to her ear.
She batted it away like an insect. “What do you want, Kyle?” she groaned.
“Are you awake?”
“Do I look awake?”
“Okay, I’ll wait.”
There was no movement from Kenzie, but I knew her mind was now stirring. No way could she go back to sleep knowing I was waiting on her to wake up. That was the difference between men and women. Women were more concerned about the well-being of others. Had it been me, I would have rolled over and gone back to sleep in an instant, completely oblivious to her need for company.
Just as predicted, I saw one eye open.
“Hi,” I grinned, as attractively as I could, given the fact I hadn’t showered in weeks.
She smiled despite herself. “Hi.”
“Are you awake now?”
“Not really.”
“You want to take a walk?”
“Right now?” She yawned. Her eyes were droopy, and she had little creases on her cheek from the bamboo floor. Her hair was matted down on one side. I fluffed it with my fingers.
“I can’t sleep.”
