He rounded the desk. I pushed my chair back to give him space. Instead of taking it, Julian sat on the edge of my desk. Right in front of me. Close enough that I could see the pulse beating in his throat. Close enough to touch.
"Are you going to tell me to leave?" he asked.
I should. I absolutely should. This was inappropriate. Dangerous. Everything I'd been trying to avoid for days.
"I should."
"But will you?"
I looked at him. At the determination in his eyes. At the way he was looking at me like I was something wanted.
"No."
Julian smiled. Slow and devastating. "Good."
He leaned down and kissed me.
I let him lead. For about thirty seconds. Let him explore. Let him kiss me with enthusiasm and eagerness and absolutely no finesse.
Then I took over.
I pulled him into my lap in one smooth motion. Julian gasped against my mouth—surprise and want mixing in that sound. I kissed him properly. The way I'd been wanting to for days. Deep and thorough and possessive.
Julian arched into me. His hands fisted in my shirt. Pulled me closer like he was afraid I'd pull away again.
I wasn't pulling away. Not this time.
My hands slid under his t-shirt. Found warm skin. Julian shivered and gasped again. I swallowed the sound with another kiss.
He was straddling my lap now. Fitted perfectly against me. I could feel his body responding. Could feel my own response. Could feel every ounce of control I'd been maintaining for weeks finally cracking.
I pulled back. Had to. Had to make sure he understood what this meant.
"Julian. Are you sure about this?"
His eyes were dark. Pupils blown wide. Lips swollen from kissing. He looked thoroughly debauched and we'd barely started.
"I've never been more sure of anything."
"This changes everything."
"I know. I want it to change. I'm tired of pretending I don't want you. Tired of you pretending you don't want me." His hands came up to frame my face. "Stop fighting this."
I kissed him again. Let myself have this one thing I shouldn't want. This person who saw through all my carefully constructed walls and chose me anyway.
Julian kissed back with desperate enthusiasm. Ground against me in a way that suggested he had no idea what he was doing but was determined to figure it out.
I groaned. Gripped his hips to still him. "Slow down."
"Why?"
"Because you're going to make yourself come just from that. And I'd rather make it last."
Julian's eyes went wide. "I—what?"
"You're a virgin, Julian. Completely inexperienced. Your body's going to respond fast to stimulation. We need to slow down." I ran my hands up his sides. Watched him shiver. "Trust me?"
"Yes."
