The baby cries next to me as the woman tries to comfort her. “My husband has PTSD. Can’t be in confined spaces. I’m wishing I’d let this one stay at home with him.”
“You going on holiday?”
“Just visiting my sister. She’d have killed me if I left her niece at home.”
Her daughter reaches out for me.
“May I?” I lift my hands to the small child.
“Be my guest,” the woman says, dropping her daughter into my lap.
She stops crying and plays with the end of my tie.
“She likes you.”
A smile stretches across my face. “There, there. Everything’s better now we’re in the clouds, right.”
She dribbles onto my tie, but her jabbering is oddly soothing, distracting me from the clouds outside and the turbulence in my head.
“Sir, Grace cannot come right now,” Lisa, the flight attendant says.
She put me in economy on purpose. “Tell her if she doesn’t get her arse in here, there’ll be consequences.”
The strawberry flavour on my tongue reminds me of my strawberry ice cream girl. She’s the only one who calms me, although the baby on my knee seems to have been a good enough distraction. But it’s also a reminder of all the things I’ve missed with my son.
Rose has the ability to calm and infuriate me at the same time, but right now I just need to see her. I need to know she hasn’t abandoned me like she did before. She’s the only thing that silences the ghosts on a flight and since I found her again, she’s the only person who’s made me feel alive after the darkness.
A few minutes later, the flight attendant returns with a napkin. “She sent this, sir.”
I open the napkin to the words “go fuck yourself” written in red lipstick.
A snarl forms on my face. I hand the baby back to the woman next to me. “Excuse me.” Standing, I clench my fists at my side and walk through the curtain into business class. Busy my arse. There’s about five passengers here. It’s now clear she booked me in economy on purpose.
“Sir, you can’t be up here,” Lisa says.
“This won’t take long.” I step into an empty seat, allowing her to push the drinks trolly down the aisle.
Rose’s face pales at the front of the plane in the crew area.
I storm down the aisle, my blood pumping, feelingthe anger in my veins.
Her body stiffens as I guide her by the elbow into the small restroom.
“What the hell are you doing?”
I slam the napkin against the mirror, my chest rising and falling against her back with heavy panting breaths.
We stare at each other in the mirror, her own chest rising and pushing against the buttons on her shirt.
“I will fuck myself. The next time I’m watching you in bed alone, your hand slipping between your thighs. I’ll fuck myself knowing you’re thinking of me.”
Her mouth parts, eyes wide.
“Were you thinking of me the other night while you stroked your pussy?”
“You’re crazy.”
“You’re the reason I’m like this. You drive me fucking insane.” My arm wraps around her, my hand sliding to her neck so I can feel her pulse beneath my fingers. My dick hardens thinking of her touching herself. Her pulse flutters against my fingers, mirroring mine as all the blood in my head rushes to my groin.
