Her hair clip falls to the floor as I lift the balaclava from her. “This is what I had when I was in the army. It keeps your face warm.” Taking the clip from her, I secure it in her hair, holding back her loose waves. Then lift her into my arms and carry her up the steps to the studio, not wanting to let her go. I need to hold her more than she needs me to.
“You gonna be okay?” I kiss her cheek.
She looks back at me and places her hand on my face. “Will you be okay, Daddy?”
A smile spreads across my face. I think about staying and waiting in the car for the next ninety minutes in case she needs me. “I’m not okay.”
She giggles in my arms. “Auntie Poppy look after me, Daddy.”
As I walk into the space, Dom pecks Poppy on the cheek and walks towards me. “How’s my tiny dancer?”
“Uncle Dom,” she says, her smile widening.
He reaches out and takes her from me, and reluctantly I let her go.
“You ready for your first class? Poppy’s excited to have you.”
“Yes. You look after Daddy?”
Dom chuckles, pecks her nose, and puts her down on her feet.
She runs towards Poppy in her ballet slippers, her pink tutu fanning with every step.
Dom pats me on the back. “You’re gonna wait in the car, aren’t you?”
“I thought about it.”
“She’ll be fine. Look, she’s in her element.”
We both gaze at Ebony showing Poppy her pirouettes, the studio filling around us, but I just watch my girl’s beaming face as she does another twirl.
Just as I think she’s forgotten all about me, she runs back to me with her arms open. I bend down and lift her up as she wraps her arms around my neck. “Love you, Daddy.”
“Love you more, twinkle toes.”
All the students gather in front of the tall mirrors and the ballet bar.
I bend, letting Eb back on her feet. “Have fun. I’ll be back in ninety minutes to pick you up, okay?” I hand over her ballerina bag with snacks and tap shoes
“Okay, Daddy.” She runs back to Poppy and turns, giving me a wave.
I smile as I walk out of the door with Dom and trudge to my car.
“Want to come over to the house?” Dom asks, pulling a tin of tobacco from his pocket.
I look at the balaclava on the seat. Memories of Lilly’s leaking nipples fill my mind, and I wonder if Samuel’s gone back to sleep.
Taking my chances, I open the car door and climb in. “Another time, pal. I have some trouble I need to take care of.”
“Oh?”
A grin spreads across my face.
“Oh, that trouble.” He nods his head and pats the roof of my car as I back out of the space with the balaclava in my lap. The wooly material beneath my palm brings back all the memories with my nightingale.
I’d forgotten it was here. As I drive, I remember the last time I wore this.
Date night.
