I close the bedroom door gently and slump down the stairs. I’m sorry for a lot of things, but most of all I’m sorry I can’t be the man she needs. I’m a fucking selfish bastard. She needs a father, and I’ve just ruined everything. We can’t come back from this.
28
VIOLET
Iroll over to stop the sun shining in my eyes. No wonder Kane’s always up early, he doesn’t have any curtains. I hug the duvet around my neck, inhaling the intoxicating scent of him, weed, and sex that lingers in his bed. Despite my annoyance with him last night, I’ve had the best night’s sleep I’ve ever had, probably due to having the best sex of my life too. He’s ruined me for other boys. I can’t imagine anyone ever topping that. The way he looks at me as if it’s the last time he will see me or be with me. Maybe it is. I hope not.
With no clock in his room, I’m unsure of the time. I pad down the hall into my room. My phone is on the bedside table. Kane had moved the furniture out the way of the leak. The smell of coffee hits my nostrils and I hear cutlery being pulled out of a drawer.
My empty stomach wills me downstairs. I grab a pair of pyjama shorts, seeing as I can’t find my knickers, then I remember Kane tore them in two. A smile lifts my cheeks and my pussy clenches at the memory.
With a tingle coursing through my veins, I rush the stairs with hunger in my belly, though I’m more hungry for him than anything. I slow my movements and pad barefoot into the kitchen. He’s cooking.
Fucking pancakes.
My body tenses. Not another apology breakfast. I thought after last night he would accept our fate. How many times can one person apologise for wanting someone? What do I have to do to let him know I want this? It’s okay to want me because I want him too. I need him like I need my next breath.
He turns and places a plate of pancakes on the table. His gaze drifts over me, lingering on my face. “Hungry?”
I swallow. “I’m not eating another one of your fucking remorse dishes.”
“Is that what you think this is?” His lips curl in the corner as though this is funny.
“Isn’t it? This is what you do, isn’t it?” I fold my arms across my chest. As hungry as I am, I would sooner starve than swallow his guilt.
His muddy boots trudge along the kitchen tiles. “I’m not remorseful.” His hands grip my shoulders, steel-blue eyes search my face. “Are you?”
My jaw drops, parting my lips. His breath fans my cheek as he inches closer to my mouth, but hesitates, seeking permission. Without words, I seal the approval he requires with my kiss. Tongues tangle in a promise. His rough hands roam my body, finding their way under my shirt to the bare skin of my back. A shiver runs the length of my spine and I shudder in his arms. He deepens the kiss, holding me against him.
“Now are you gonna eat my breakfast or do I have to force feed you?” A smile reaches his eyes, wrinkling his temples with the weary lines I’ve come to love.
“I’ll let you force feed me anything as long as there’s no bitter aftertaste.”
He raises a brow with a smirk playing on his lips. “Is that so?”
I hop on the table next to the plate of pancakes and pick up a fork.
“Wait. Do you want syrup?” Kane takes the fork from me.
“Yes.”
His palms glide up my thighs. “Yes, what?”
“Yes, Daddy.”
He shakes his head with a grin. “I meant please. Where are your manners, Vi?”
“You can’t talk to me about manners when you left me alone last night after what we did.” My legs swing under the table.
His shoulders slump. “I’m sorry about that. I sleep alone. It’s the only way I can get any sleep.” He turns around to face the cupboard and pulls out the syrup in a squeezy bottle.
“So when Lilly long legs stays over, you don’t sleep?”
He chuckles again. “You jealous of Lilly?”
I roll my eyes.
He squirts the syrup on the pancakes in long ropes, then cuts a piece off and brings the sugar-coated fork to my lips. “She would sleep in the bed and when she was asleep, I would slip into the other room. She knew I slept alone, and she never pushed it.”
