“Are not involved at all,” I said, voice low.
“Mmkay.” Mika gave me a knowing smile. “Camilla’s still after him. So if you keep him away from her, you will be my hero. And if you two get married, even better. You would be the absolute best sister ever. In case you’re wondering,” she jerked her head to Imogen, who was further up in the limousine, complaining to the driver about the temperature, “I’m in the market for an upgrade.”
“I’m not sure Evan’s looking to get married again,” I told her.
And even if by some miracle Evan decided he wanted me for more than sex—and I was totally okay with us keeping our relationship purely sexual—I would never have a big wedding. We would go to the courthouse, I would wear civil ceremony chic, then we’d go to a nice restaurant and be in bed by nine thirty. No irate bridesmaids, no frazzled makeup artists, and no bridezillas.
The few remaining bridesmaids that Imogen hadn’t driven off were already at the salon when we arrived. They were sitting on the tufted white leather chairs, digging into the snacks and drinks.
“Stop!” Imogen screeched, slapping the crackers out of one girl’s hands. “You can’t eat so much before my wedding. You’re going to get bloated and ruin my pictures. Did no one read the dietary restriction email I sent out? You are only allowed to drink lemon tea or noncarbonated water. You are only allowed to eat raw tuna and kale. No carbs, no salty meats, and no cheese!” Imogen glared at another girl. “Are you trying to ruin my wedding, Daisy? You of all people should know better. Your rack is already gigantic.” She motioned to Daisy’s chest area. “You’re just eating all this salty food to try and show me up with your huge tits and steal my spotlight.”
Imogen started sobbing, and my mom consoled her.
“This is crazy,” Daisy said flatly to me and Mika. “I’m out.”
“Please,” Mika begged, “the wedding is in two weeks. Don’t quit!”
Daisy shook her off.
“Kaitlyn was right,” she said, grabbing her bag. “Imogen has turned into an awful bridezilla.”
“You can’t quit!” Imogen yelled at her, chasing her out of the salon. “You can’t quit because I’m firing you! I’ve fired you as a bridesmaid.”
“And then there were three,” I muttered. Mika, Ashley, and Brandy were the last remaining bridesmaids from the original ten.
“What kind of sister are you?” Imogen said to Mika. “You did this on purpose.”
“People have to have something to eat,” Mika replied. “We’re going to be here all afternoon while you try out hairstyles.”
“I don’t see how it’s going to take all afternoon, considering that I only have three bridesmaids left. This is a disaster!”
“Let’s try to make do with what we have. Three is a fine number,” I told Imogen, trying to soothe her. “You can still have nice pictures with three. It will be an intimate group.”
Imogen took a few deep breaths. “Ashley,” she ordered, “get in the chair. You need to have your hair dyed anyway.”
“Excuse me?” Ashley said, almost choking on her champagne.
“I will not have a bridesmaid with red hair. You’re going to clash with the dress. I don’t know why you dyed it that color.”
“This is my natural hair color,” Ashley said slowly.
“It needs to be brown,” Imogen retorted, flipping through the stylist’s book. “I want it this color.” She pointed to a photo of a chestnut-haired model.
“No!” Ashley said incredulously. “I’m not dying my hair. That’s crazy.”
“If you were my friend, you would.” Imogen pouted.
“I guess we’re not friends then. Have a nice life,” Ashley retorted, grabbing her purse and leaving.
“Why does this keep happening?” Imogen wailed, sinking onto a sofa.
“Weddings show you who your real friends are,” my mother said, consoling Imogen. The bride sniffed and dabbed her eyes.
“Why don’t you go on and get in the stylist chair and let her pretty you up?”
Imogen perched in the chair as the stylist started brushing out her hair. “I can’t have only two bridesmaids. I can’t,” she repeated.
“Well, now you’re only having one,” Brandy stated, waving her phone accusingly at Imogen. “You told my mom that she couldn’t wear any of the outfits she had and had to go buy something new?”
