“Yes, you mentioned it the first night I met you. I had Kate do some more digging into your activities in Afghanistan.”
Grant’s eyes narrowed. What had she dug up? Was that why she was acting as if she hated him?
“I did some things I regret,” he said, not breaking eye contact with his father. “And some things I don’t.”
His father was silent for a moment then said, “So you murdered three Afghan soldiers, among other things.”
“Yep,” said Grant brusquely.
“How come you weren’t arrested, kicked out, or whatever they do in the military?”
Grant shrugged. “We were out on patrol. No one in my unit liked the guys. They hated that they were pedos. So I shot them, and the official story was that I thought they were going to kill us. There was a lot of that going on—the Afghan soldiers killing us with suicide bombs or ambushes, stuff like that. I don’t regret it. There are things I regret but not that. Anything else?”
“What about the ambush you were involved in? You received your Medal of Honor for your actions. How are you adjusting—?”
“I’m fine,” Grant said, his grip on his water glass so tight he thought it would shatter. “Nothing I can’t handle.” If he were feeling petty, he would have made his father talk about his birth mother, but he wasn’t sure if he wanted to deal with that right now.
“I’m sorry I brought it up,” his father said as the waiter cleared their plates.
Grant slowly shook his head and downed his drink. “Doesn’t matter. It happened. I have to square with that.”
“Maybe you can find some friends or invite your friends from the military…”
“My close friends all died,” Grant said, cutting off his father.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I know what it’s like to lose people you care about. You know we can find you some help.”
“I don’t need it.”
They sat in silence for another moment.
“We would always go to Martha’s Vineyard around this time,” Walter said. “The kids would all be so excited. They could ride horses and hunt for clams on the beach.”
“Nancy wants you to go this summer,” Grant told him.
“I know. I don’t think I can.”
“Everything is the first,” Grant said. “The first time you go to chow without them, the first time you go on patrol without them. You avoid it as long as possible, but then you can’t avoid it anymore.”
His father nodded.
“The first year’s the hardest. Then it doesn’t grow easier, but you learn to live with the pain.”
“I don’t want to.”
“Because it feels like a betrayal,” Grant finished. “Maybe you can find a nice girl and settle down.”
“That’smyline. There are lots of nice young women in this town. You have your pick. You should try dating.”
“So should you.”
“Not with my soon-to-be-ex running around.” His father massaged his temples. “I need to do something about her. Maybe Kate has some ideas.”
“How long have you worked with Kate?”
“A little over a year now. She’s invaluable. She knows everyone in town and is as smart as a whip. She fell into a spot of trouble at her MFA program. I’m shady on the details, but whatever put her in my path has been fate working in my favor.”
And in mine,Grant thought. “I’ll drink to that.”
