“Have at it. I’m gonna go shower. Y'all can pick any room here because I want y'all to stay the weekend. I don’t want to be alone in these mountains.”
“We’re going to be here longer than that and help you break into this house,” my mother assured me.
“Okay, I’ll meet y'all in the kitchen in an hour. Don’t get lost,” I told them.
Solace picked up her sleeping daughter from the couch, and then we headed for the staircase.
When I got to my room, I pulled out my tight bun and felt instant relief from the headache it gave me. I stripped out my Amiri sweatsuit and walked to my dresser, picking up the Clear Blue pregnancy test I had been scared to take for two days. I had been having headaches, dizzy spells, and I was bloated. My mother suggested I take a test since it had been happening for over a month. I was on the strongest birth control on the market, so there was no way. I blamed it on stress and my new environment.
I went into the bathroom and turned on the water. I set my showerhead to the waterfall setting and then took the test. I didn’t want to know the results right away, so I hopped in the shower for thirty minutes with my lavender wash.
As I washed, I rubbed my scrub loofah over my stomach. It had gotten puggy, and it had me thinking what if I was pregnant and how long. It wasn’t that farfetched that it could be Hurricane’s baby because it wasn’t that long ago since we had sex. I didn’t get periods with my birth control, so it was no telling whose baby it was, since I’d fucked them in the same week. If I were pregnant, I would go to the doctor immediately to find out the dates.
I finally stepped out of the shower and grabbed my towel. I went to the sink to brush my teeth, but couldn’t ignore my test. I took a deep breath and picked it up. Tears welled in my eyes when I read the big blue words that saidpregnant.
“Unbelievable,” I uttered as I continued to stare at the test.
There was nothing I could do. An abortion was out of the picture since I had too many with Hurricane. I was just going to test my baby’s DNA when it was born. Now, I was really ready for Mula to come home. He hadn’t called me, and I didn’t have contact with him.
I got dressed in something comfy and tossed the test in my robe pocket. I went downstairs and showed my mother and Solace the results. They were so happy for me and glad I had decided to go through with the pregnancy.
I went to the doctor two days later for an ultrasound. They couldn’t tell what the sex was yet. I was only a couple of months pregnant, and the dates lined up like I expected. It was still possible that the baby I was carrying couldn’t be Mula’s. But damn, I hoped it was.
HIDEOUT
The snow was coming downheavy outside like it always did as fat flakes stuck to the windows of the cheap-ass truck stop hotel I had been in for weeks. I had never been in the snow before, but I couldn’t lie, it was calming. I had missedThanksgiving. Now, it was almost Christmas, but it didn’t feel like the holiday season. Just me, some cash stacked on the dresser, and a head full of shit I was trying to keep straight.
Storm found me a week ago. I should’ve moved again but fuck it, I was comfortable where I was. The staff was cool, and they weren’t in my business. I gave them extra, and they stayed out of my way. She was bringing me food, checking in on me like I was her little project. She kept saying,“You don’t need to be up here alone.”
I knew what she was on. She wanted to be the one. The savior. The queen to my king. But I wasn’t stupid.
I let her hang around, as if she were working from my room,onlybecause I needed the favor still, and now I needed a burner phone. I got paranoid, PTSD high, and tossed my burner phone I had. I needed to touch base with Tory, finally. The only nigga I trusted. So, I needed to put Storm to use.
“Yo, can you get me a phone?” I asked her one night.
She perked up like a lil lapdog, happy to be useful. “Yeah, of course. What do you need it for?”
I just looked at her, real calm. “Don’t ask me no questions. Just get it.”
She didn’t like my attitude, but she didn’t push it. That’s the thing about Storm—shewantedto be defiant, but she wasn’t built for it.
I knew who was built for anything I had, though. Yummi. I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I’d get this vague-ass image, like a dream I couldn’t shake.Her stomach... rounder. Her glowing.
Was she...
I shook it off. Couldn’t let my mind run wild like that.
Finally, when Storm brought me the burner, I hit Tory up. I was irritated as hell when he started talking. It was still the same story from the last time we talked.
I sat up in bed, feeling that familiar heat in my chest. “Nigga, it’s about to be Christmas. You talking like I gotta be gone till summer.”
Tory sighed. “I’ma make sure you get home before next summer, bro. I swear it. I’m booking a private flight out to Starlight Hills in a couple of days. I’ll keep you updated.”
I exhaled slowly, nodding even though he couldn’t see me.
“A’ight. Get down here. You still gotta hit my family off for the holidays.”
“Say less.”
