“Fen is always positive, but she has scars—scars deeper than mine, and not all visible.” He touches the scar on his brow. “I’d do anything for her, and she would do the same for me.”
My chest aches.
“I know that’s how you felt about Barlowe. I wish I could have met him.”
My chin drops to stare into his eyes. “It’s nice to see this side of you, Silas.”
“Is it?”
His gaze drops, and I squeeze his hand. “It’s okay to care for people. It doesn’t make you weak.”
His gaze shifts back to mine as he lifts my chin. “But that’s where you are wrong, my love. It can make you weak.” His gaze turns hard. “Having people you openly care for can be used against you. I’ve spent years blocking out emotions, building walls to conceal my weaknesses. Fenmore is the reason I went to Daramveer. She told me to find you. I owe her everything.”
“Will seeing your father change everything?” I ask. “Will this Silas disappear?”
I think back to the boat, the few fun nights we had that were calm and normal, and a pit grows in my stomach, knowing that won’t last.
“Things will be different once we dock. I have an image to uphold, but please know it’s not me. Things won’t change between us. You are mine, and I’m yours. They will see that.”
“Should I believe that?” I ask.
“Yes,” he replies. “Now, let’s go find Maines and Oak. We will be docking soon, and I want us to be together.” He stands, leading me toward the door.
Before we cross the threshold, he turns to kiss me, and I taste the dishonesty on his lips.
The ship’s deck is crowded—more so than we are used to. I catch the look on Maines’s face as we approach, and she appears cautious—a heaviness hanging from her. She and Oak stand with Warrick and Fenmore, closest to the boat's bow, watching the shoreline become more prominent with each lapping wave. Silas holds tight to my hand as we move toward them, ignoring the looks we get with each thundering step. Fen smiles as we join them. She points to a speck on the horizon that grows larger each second.
“That’s Andorwood,” Fen says loudly, over the crashing waves.
I notice Warrick move closer to her, and she immediately creates a casual distance by leaning over the ship's railing with a flirty smile, as if teasing him. I examine his strong face. Warrick’s cheekbones are prominent, yet his face is full, and it strikes me how large he truly is, especially next to Silas. I scan the area for the other two men under Fenmore—Hux and Larkin—but don’t see them.
“Where are the others?” I ask, not particularly to anyone.
Warrick peels his gaze from Fenmore and responds, “As Hux oversees our land operations, he is likely somewhere near the quarterdeck, desperate to get off this ship. He’s known to get very seasick.”
Fen laughs to herself.
“And Larkin,” Warrick points high above us toward the crow’s nest, “is there. Per usual.”
I glance up to see the tall man with near white hair standing in a small lookout tower high above the deck.
“Would you like to go up there?” Silas asks, leaning in. “The view is quite amazing.”
I turn to him, a grin curling my lips. “Are you sure we won’t be bothering him?”
Warrick laughs at my response and says with an almost feline smile, “All Silas does is bother us.”
I cast a quick glance at Maines, and she returns a weary smile—letting me know she will be fine—before she moves closer to Oak. I watch Fen observe them for a moment.
Before I have time for another thought, Silas grabs my hand and shifts us to the lookout. We land with a soft thud, and the distance between us and the ground makes my head spin. My stomach flips, and I grab onto the railing as quickly as possible before Silas steadies me.
“You can’t possibly be afraid of heights,” Silas chuckles.
“I’m afraid of falling to my death.” I clench my eyes shut briefly before opening them once more to the blinding light around us.
Larkin remains unfazed, still studying the horizon, mumbling to himself.
“We thought you looked lonely, Larkin.” Silas turns to face him on the small platform, one that is very close to being cramped. “Figured we would bother you for a second for this view.”
