Terror, confusion, and anger begin to bubble in my chest, and I blink back into myself. The events of the library and Maines crash into my mind, and I look to Larkin. He remains frozen, horrified by the events, and unsure of what to say to me or how to help.
“We should go,” Larkin says gently, as he steps toward me. “We can help.”
I feel my anger rising, and I can’t control it. It becomes so unbearable that I feel like my body is going to rip in two.
“Idiots!”
I bound toward him, stopping inches from his face, and narrow my eyes.
“Why did you let her come with you? Why did you let her enter the fucking library?” I slam my fist against his chest andcry. “You knew the risks, and you let her anyway. This is all your fault.”
I hear the words leave my lips, and I know they aren’t true, but I can’t stop. Anger fills me, and I need a desperate escape. Larkin is the only one around to receive the blows. I can’t stop myself, and I don’t try. I can only see blood, burnt flesh, and death.
“She wanted to help,” he rasps.
I swing my fist against his chest.
“Stop talking,” I weep.
“You know Maines would do anything for you,” he whispers.
I hit him again, slamming my fist into his hard body, and he watches my outburst in shock.
“Why did you let her enter the fucking library?” I cry as I continue to drive my fist into his chest, letting the tears roll down my cheeks like falling rain.
Larkin doesn’t move.
He stands steady and unwavering against each of my blows, letting me take out every ounce of anger and sadness that overwhelms me. My vision blurs through the tears, and I look at his face. It’s stone cold, and he refuses to meet my stare, but he remains.
“She could die. The only person who has loved me through everything might die.” I slam my fist into his body again, weeping, and my knuckles ache. “Die. She could die!”
“Stop, Briar,” Larkin orders.
“No.”
Larkin remains calm, but catches my fist as I try to drive it toward his cheek. His fingers wrap tightly around my wrist.
I try to pull my arm away, but he holds on, keeping his gaze fixed beyond me.
“I can’t lose her.” I begin to sob uncontrollably and try to throw my other fist toward him.
He catches my other wrist and grips them both tight before I can pull from his hold.
“Please, stop,” Larkin begs, and I hear how desperate his ask is.
“I’m going to be alone in this world,” I cry, feeling my legs give out. “I can’t lose her. I can’t fucking lose her.”
“You aren’t alone.”
“I am,” I sob, my cries filling the narrow hallway around us. “I am so alone.”
“You aren’t,” he snaps. “Silas is here. Oak is here. You aren’t alone in this world.”
“Everyone left,” I sob. “I have no one.”
“Look at me.” He grips my wrists, forcing my gaze to find his. “I am here. I am real.”
Tears streak down my cheeks.
