It was like wading through a snowdrift.Lina peered down at her feet, but the tide was still out, revealing a narrow sand bridge leading from Oseidos to the mainland.Seafoam licked at her boots and the ward groaned with protest as she clawed her way through.
It did not stop her from leaving.
The city of Lodestone glittered in the night, torchlight and lamplit windows shining like beacons.Miniature suns, welcoming her back.
Wardstrings bit at her neck, but at least off Oseidos and far away from Ione, she could do no further damage.Lina gritted her teeth through the last heavy lengths of the ward – and through the pain of imagining Ione tomorrow morning, the confusion and hurt she would feel when she realised Lina had disappeared.
Castor was injured and Lina would be there for him.Distract him, fend him off.Keep him away from the people who had been so kind to her.So warm.
Fight, flight; freeze, fawn.Lina had been good at fawning once.
Chapter Thirteen
Ione
“I frightened her.”Ione pushed the cup of rose tea to the centre of the table in her bedroom, unable to stomach it.“I shouldn’t have told her.”
Cynthia inched her chair closer, letting their shoulders touch.It was as far as Cynthia would go by ways of comfort, and Ione was thankful for it.“You would’ve had to tell her eventually.”
Ione ran through the conversation again.The kiss.The way Lina had held her, looked at her, like she was precious.And then, after Ione had revealed her divinity, how the devotion in Lina’s eyes gradually shifted to fear.
She’d concealed it well enough, fast enough that Ione had supposed she’d imagined it.Menon was right about you, she had thought, hugging Lina goodbye before she returned to the acolytes’ building for the evening.Ione watched her go until she couldn’t anymore, and then clasped her hands over her racing heart.
There you are, Menon.Wake, now.Wake!
Lina did not come to her this morning.Was not seen at breakfast.Had not slept in her bed.And then a couple of guards stepped forward to reveal to Cynthia what they’d seen the night before on their walk: a young woman clutching a cloak around her shoulders, darting off into the low-tide surf.It was up to her if she wanted to go, they had said; they weren’t about to risk leaving the ward themselves to chase after her.
“I still should have waited.Or explained it better.I could hear it, how scared she was, and…” Ione’s mouth quivered; she wiped it roughly with the back of her hand.“Andgods, it is stupid to waste tears on this when so much else is happening.”
Cynthia sipped at her own tea, eyes downcast.“It’s… odd though, that she would leave Oseidos altogether.”Her teacup clattered into its saucer.“Isn’t it?”
“She was afraid,” Ione answered, certain and ashamed.“My being Menon scared her.My being gentry made her feel trapped.”She blinked back tears, angry with herself, and wished for once that Cynthia would say something gentle and not whatever she was really thinking.“I didn’t see us as different.I truly didn’t.Did she?Did it weigh on her?”
Cynthia pursed her lips.Half-shrugged,I don’t know, silent yet telling.
Of course.Ione swiped at her eyes, smoothed her hair from her face, summoned her familiar coldness, a safety blanket.She had forgotten once again, had needed the reminder: it did not matter how she saw them, Lina, Cynthia, River, everyone.They were not friends.Family.Anything.Menon was unreachable.
And so, so lonely.
She heard River’s footsteps out in the hall, bade him to enter before he had the chance to knock.Kept her eyes down, her expression smooth and serene as a deep pool, and choked down a scalding gulp of tea.
Thought of roses and honey, that quiet moment in her bedroom, the softness of Lina’s hands in hers.Tasted bile.
“You all right?”River reached across the table for the teapot and refilled her half-empty cup.“Still upset with Saros?”
Cynthia drew her knees to her chest.“Lina’s gone.”
River cursed, nearly dropping the teapot.“Gone?What – ” He looked to Cynthia,Help me.“What d’you meangone?”
“Gone,” Ione said stiffly.She folded her hands on her lap, fingernails digging into her palms.“I told her who I was – ”
“Youwhat?”
“ – and it frightened her, so she left Oseidos to get away from me.And it’s fine and I’m fine.”
Silence fell over them like a wet rag.Eventually River released a strangled little noise and cleared his throat.“To confirm – Lina isgone?”
Cynthia answered for her.“Yes.”
