The week kept moving and we fell into our routine with enough ease to keep my mind centered on other things. Including talking to Jovi.
But somehow three days went by without either of us crossing paths with the other. I even skipped having the kids bring him dinner and took it out to him myself. But every time I went out to the barn, a meal in hand, he was off working a horse or fixing a fence or running an errand.
Then Thursday rolled around.
And Tammy served me papers.
Not empty threats. Not an overspill of grief.
She's suing me for custody.
Twenty-four hours have passed since I opened the envelope and read those words, and still I have no fucking clue how to stop her. No amount of reading the papers over or processing or hiding them under my mattress has gotten me any closer to an answer.
"Liz?" Cas's voice follows a knock at my back door, and I retrace my last few steps to reenter the kitchen I was on the verge of leaving. "Oh, there you are."
"Are you looking for the kids?" I ask. "I sent them all up to Gavin's room with apples and cheese sticks a minute ago." Rodeo riders should be rolling in anytime now and I prefer to keep all three kids inside while the trucks and trailers are moving through. We'll head out a few minutes before the first event once everyone's settled.
"Actually, I was looking for Jovi. He stepped out about half an hour ago, and he hasn't been back since. Crow is down there, taking signups and making sure everyone's got a waiver on file, but Jovi usually handles putting together the line up."
Crow started coming out the second week we opened up our rodeo nights just to watch. He was an up-and-coming bronc rider, making a real name for himself in the circuit when he got pinned by a horse inside the chute and nearly died. He's fully recovered now, but I don't think he'll ever be able to ride like that again. Not that itscared him away from the action. He's been here volunteering every Friday since.
"Jovi hasn't been up to the house," I tell him, frowning as my mind starts to wander.
Where would he go this close to starting time? It's unusual for him to disappear. Being dependable is Jovi's whole thing. If any man ever knew how to relentlessly show up, it's Jovi.
I used to find it annoying. Now, I see it for what it is. Invaluable. The most generous sort of love.
He gives of himself. His time. Without question. Without limitation. Without hesitation. Always.
"He didn't say where he was going or what he was going to do?" I ask, nerves knotting up at the pit of my stomach. "Could he be hurt? It's not like him to drop the ball on something like this."
Cas shrugs, his frown only adding to the helplessness of the gesture. "All he said was that he was stepping out and he'd be back."
I nod, chewing the inside of my cheek. "Can you stay with the kids for a sec? I might know where to find him."
"Of course."
As soon as I see his head begin to drop into a nod, I start moving. I don't know why, but there's only one place I can think to look. One place that's insane to consider and yet it's all that flashes inside my head as I go over the places Jovi might be.
I practically run from the back door down to the barn, cutting through the small pasture filling the space between the backyard and the paddocks attached to the rear stalls. Voices and hooves and horse snorts fill the air the closer I get, but I tune them all out, making my way around the back and slipping in through the small door leading into the feed room.
The ladder to the hay attic is down and I don't think twice before I start to climb it. Hay hasn't been stored up here since the pole barn was built, allowing for more space and easier access, so I'm not surprised to find the space empty. Nor am I surprised to find one of the hatch windows lining the slanted roof open.
My steps slow as I approach it, and I take a breath before I reach my hands into the frame, grip tight and jump. I gain just enough air to pull myself up and through.
"Liz."
"What," I grunt, dragging myself out the rest of the way as Jovi hurries to crawl toward me, "is your obsession with rooftops?"
He settles back into sitting, arms out as though he's ready to catch me if I start to fall. The roof feels unexpectedly sturdy, though I make a point not to look down. I'm not necessarily scared of heights, but it's a little unnerving to be so far up, at an angle, with nothing to stop you or grab ahold of if you were to slip.
"I like to come up here and think," he admits, but there's no sheepish grin to go with it. No mischievous twinkle in those eyes that aren't supposed to know how not to sparkle. The only time I ever saw them flat like this was when his father died. And then again after Lena and Trent’s accident.
"Did someone die?" I blurt out before I can think it over.
"What?" he lets out a surprised laugh. But there's no amusement in it. "No. No one died. Brennan's being an asshole, but that's about it."
My jaw tenses. "What did he do?"
