She turned to the innkeeper. “Do not inform the king of my presence until the morning. I wish to rest first before that inquisition begins.”
* * *
The ship rocked with the pounding swell. Angus stood at the bow and rocked with it. The raging sea was a comfort, somehow. This, he could navigate and predict; Annabella, on the other hand, was a mystery. She loved him, and had admitted as much, but the moment he tried to make her understand the delicacy with which they needed to proceed, she had turned venomous. Well, to hell with her. She could return to her palace and her dukes, and he would think of her no longer.
“Your father wishes to speak with you,” Graham said. “I want to stay here.”
“He thought you might say that, so he told me to say you must listen to your elders.” Graham was grinning from ear to ear.
Angus had not seen him smile like that since they had taken Annabella. “And if I refuse?”
“He said that I can push you over the side.”
Angus laughed, as he strode toward his father. Graham was a great fighter, but he had never bested Angus. The two had shared an incredible friendship, and it had pained Angus to endure Graham’s dislike for the situation with Annabella. It appeared his friend had been right all along.
“You have a heavy heart,” his father said, as Angus sat beside him.
“What is done is done, and there is nothing I can do about it. She wanted to return to her family, and I have other responsibilities.”
“Nothing is that simple, lad, as you very well ken.”
“What was I supposed to do, then?”
“What did you want to do?”
“I wanted to make her see how difficult my choices are. That I am not in a position to put one person above everyone else, least of all myself.”
“Do you think she does not understand that?”
“I do not know what she thinks or wants.” It was true. The woman spouted love out of one side of her mouth, then wishing only to return to her family out of the other. “I am better off on my own than with a woman who does not know what she wants.”
“Angus, that is your broken heart talking. If you would stop for a moment and think about what she said, you will realize that the woman is truly as much in love with you as you are with her. She is angry because she is not permitted to simply marry whomever she chooses. How do you think it is for noblewomen? We men choose their husbands for them, and often without much of a care for their desires. Believe me, I know how it was with your sister. Annabella displayed no different behaviour than your sister did when she finally understood the importance of an alliance with MacLean. That is what you told the girl, is it not?”
“Were you listening, then?”
“Aye, of course I was listening. As was everyone else once you both began bellowing at one another.”
Angus had not realized the others could overhear. Graham’s smirk now made more sense. Regardless, Annabella was back with the Stewart, and he would be where he belonged soon enough. Perhaps he would bed Alice again soon. The woman had always proven her discretion, and her faithfulness had been unwavering. Angus needed the company and the release.
“Do not make any decisions while your blood is up, Angus. Do you remember me telling you that?”
“Aye, and do you remember me telling you the same thing when you were getting involved with Sutherland? You would not heed your own sound advice, remember? I have been the one to pick up the pieces while you have been atoning for your sins.”
“Are you telling me you do not want the position I have bestowed upon you?” His father looked genuinely hurt.
“No, I am saying that you do not need to lecture me on what is right and wrong. I have been leading this clan for three years in your absence. Annabella could not accept my responsibilities, so that is the end of that.”
“Very well, but there is one aspect of this situation you are forgetting.” “And what is that?”
“That nothing worth having comes without a damned good fight. You and she have admitted your feelings, but what have you done to protect those feelings and each other? At the first sign of challenge, you both bolt and run the other way, spouting some such noble shite.” His father grasped him by the shoulders. “You have true love in your grasp, lad. All you need to do is reach out and take it.”
“Those are pretty words, Father. But the reality of the situation is much more complicated than that. Are you telling me I should ignore the fact that, if Annabella had returned with us, the Stewart would have landed on our doorstep with his army? What then? How could I explain to the women and children whose husbands and fathers perished at his hands that their sacrifice was so that their laird could be with the woman he loved?”
“You acted wisely, Angus. I am not saying you did not. But I am telling you that if you give up, then you do not deserve the gift she has bestowed up on you.”
“I wish it were that simple, Father.”
“You know that things are only as complicated as we allow them to be.”
