“I don’t know, but it makesmore sense.How are we to know what to do otherwise?”
Cai resisted the urge to run hishands into his hair.He had only just been beginning to work outhis own notions of right and wrong when he had lost his teacher.Hedidn’t mind acting abbot when it came to work schedules, but hewasn’t in any way ready for preaching or the cure of men’s souls.“I’ve told you.Just try to think for yourselves.Just…” The barnfaded out from around him.He was back on an island beach, lockedin conflict with a Viking who had just decided not to kill.Fen waswild-eyed, glaring at him.You, with your blasted Christian ways, your damnedcompassion!I feel your pain more than my own.I feel another man’spain before I inflict it!“Just try to imagine whatever you’re about to doto someone else is happening to you.If you don’t bloody like it,then stop.”
He paused for breath.Nobodyseemed impressed.Perhaps he should have said it in Latin.Onlyhalf-convinced himself, he gave it up in favour of practicalities.“Friswide, your hens need more oyster shell in their feed, I shouldthink.And—no offence toyou, Barda—your fire could use a good clean.Sea coal doesburn green, and gives precious little heat on a blocked hearth.”Heturned on Godric.“And you—if an order’s what you want, I’ll giveyou one.Finish your work here, then bring anyone who can be sparedup to the barns and help us save our crop.”
Cai pulled Fen into his arms.Hetightened his embrace, and Fen let go a shuddering moan andsubsided against his chest.His hair was damp with sweat—Cai ranhis fingers through it, marvelling at the virile strength of everystrand.He was letting it grow, avoiding Brother Cedric with hisshears.Soon it would be a Viking mane again.“Are you allright?”
“Gods, yes.”Fen coughedand caught his breath, which was coming as fast as Cai’s.Hestroked Cai’s belly, caressing the dark fleece at the base of hiscock.“I must send you away more often.”
Cai chuckled.He’d had a lonely weekof it, out among the hills.And for all the gnawing fear in hismind, all the way down from the top of Dragon’s Tail Ridge to thelights of Fara, to the very door of his weary pony’s stable, oneneed had been consuming him.And there, desire made flesh, a wishgranted, had been Fen, leaning in the doorway, pale skin glowing inthe lantern’s flame.They had waited until the pony was rubbed downand fed, but no longer than that.Cai frowned, suddenly doubtful.“Did I hurt you?”
“A little.But we canmanage on passion and spit, and I sucked you magnificently beforeyou began, did I not?”Fen gave the curling black hair a tug whenCai groaned.“What—do I offend you, mealy-mouthed monk?”
Smiling, Cai ignored the jibe.He hadlearned to express himself plainly enough to satisfy any Viking.“No.You make me want to go again.”
“Mm.So I see.Is theresomething in the water, on top of those lonely hills?”
“There’s precious little ofanything up there.”Cai took hold of the exploring hand trying toassist his newborn erection.Reluctantly he drew it away, lifted itand kissed its palm.“And there’s no Danan.I followed all herusual trails, all the places she showed me where the best herbsgrow.No sign of her in the villages either, not for weeks.Did youfare any better here?”
“No.I did as you asked andmade my way into all the cellars and hidden chambers of thisplace.”
“Did you do as I asked anddo it discreetly?”
Fen stretched luxuriantly, settlinghimself in Cai’s arms.He had come in a stormy rush, pressed tightto the stable wall.His belly was still damp and glimmering withseed.“I didn’t have to.Nobody challenged me.”
Cai surveyed the beautiful frame ofhim, strength manifest in every limb, even freshly drained andsleepy as he was.“No.I’m sure they didn’t.You were meant to besubtle about it though, Fen.”
“Subtle wouldn’t have gotme into the Canterbury crow’s chambers.”
“Oh, God.Whatdid?”
“A fat bribe of your poppydraft to Laban.He’s got a taste for it, you know.”
“Is that who’s beensiphoning it off?”
Fen nodded, the silky shift of hishair over Cai’s chest distracting.“He’s a troubledsoul.”
“What did you tellhim?”
“Just that I’d keep hissecret, if he kept mine.And that I was looking for something,which is perfectly true.I checked the studies, the storage rooms,everywhere.Even beneath Abbot Aelfric’s sacred bunk.”
Cai snorted with laughter.“What didyou find there?”
“A few miserable spiders,discussing how best to spin their way out of hellfire.I don’tthink your old lady’s in this place, beloved.I’ve lookedeverywhere.”
Beloved.Cai closed his eyes.Fen’s easy,sincere delivery of the word sent it straight into his heart.Sincethat harvest-moon night, they’d kept silent on the nature of theirbond, but there was that word, that name Fen pronounced so freely.Cai kissed his brow.“All right.She may have taken a longerjourney, though I never knew her to travel far from here before.How was Aelfric while I was away?”
“Quiet.Up here, anyway.”Fen eased away far enough to look at him.“He concerns me, though.He’s been down to the village every day.”
“What—preaching tothem?”
“No.Doing as you saidGodric’s wife told you—sitting amongst them and telling themstories.I followed him down once, sat in the shadows and listened.He told about a woman who was faithless to her husband, and herthigh and her belly swelled up and rotted.”Fen gave a twitch ofdispleasure.“Where does he get such a tale?”
“From the Bible,unfortunately.Though you’d have to dig deep to find such a foulone.Ugh—why doesn’t he tell them about loaves and fishes, ormaking the blind man see?”
“I don’t suppose those onesare frightening enough.They all looked whey-faced by the end ofit, especially the women.”
“Curse him.Why is he doingthis?Are they taking him seriously?”
