The push of that great cock inside himburned the touch of Fen’s fingers to an ashen memory.The mountingpressure would destroy him.He felt with anguished detail the gapeof his arsehole to accommodate the head, and he stifled a yell ashis muscles clamped down afterwards, a reflex of shutdown andrepulsion.“No!Stop.I can’t.”
Fen went still.He released Cai’s hipsand put his arms around his waist, the hold at once so powerful andso tender that tears blurred Cai’s vision.He kissed a hot trackbetween Cai’s shoulder blades, up the back of his neck.“Pain?”
“No.Just…too much.Toomuch inside me.”
“I will stop.If you aresure.”
“No, I’m bloody not.”It came outon a sob.The only thing worse than this overwhelming pressurewould be the loss of it, the emptiness of that.Fen had soundedbreathless, his voice ragged.“Am I hurtingyou?”
“The muscles inside you arestrong.And you’re fighting me.”
“I’m not.I want you.I…”
Fen took hold of his cock.His gripwas hard.Shocks of pleasure went through Cai, undoing the ironlock of his arse around the penetration.More oil came, Fenreleasing his embrace long enough to pour it over his shaft whereit was holding Cai open.His fingers pushed gently against the ringof strained flesh, rubbing the oil in.Fen said something in hisown language, deep and rough, and once more Cai almost understoodit, the words following Fen’s touch, the fullness inside whichsuddenly was not unbearable but essential, perfect, the one thingthat Cai had to have.
“Fuck me,” he commandedagain, this time knowing exactly what he was demanding.“Yes.God,all the way, Fen.Now!”
Fen moved, a deep thrust that drovethe heat into Cai’s core.Cai gave a cry of astonished relief.Hestopped crushing the hay in his hands and flattened them to thebarn floor, taking his weight on his palms, lifting his hips tomeet Fen’s next great push, up and in, then drawing slowly back sothat the strange golden fruit swelled up again beneath thefriction, throbbed and threatened to burst.He moaned and shook hishead, the pleasure harder to endure than the pain hadbeen.
Fen began a rhythmic movement.He kepthis grip on Cai’s shaft, wrapped the other arm tight round hiswaist and secured him.His breath came and went against Cai’sear—shuddering breath and more words in that wild tongue thatsounded like the sea, and then a low growl of oncomingrelease.
Cai couldn’t tell him to wait or tolet go.He wanted both—to make the pounding fuck go on forever, andto have Fen explode into his body now.Then all choice and wordsdissolved as a climax like nothing he had ever felt before began toclaw its way up out of his bones.It seemed to come from every inchof him—his marrow, his lungs, the place where his backside waslocked and convulsing round Fen’s shaft—tearing him up by theroots, ripping raw shouts from him as bolt after thunderbolt ofecstasy hit.His cock spent into Fen’s hand, into the grip thatnever faltered even when Fen choked out his name, broke rhythm andrammed to completion.
They hit the barn floor hard enough toskin Cai’s belly.Fen landed on top of him, knocking the air fromhis lungs, and redeemed the pain of withdrawal with an impassionedclasp of his shoulders, tenderly brushing back the hair from hisface with his free hand.“Caius!”
Cai grunted.His face was buried inthe crook of Fen’s arm, and he never wanted to see daylight again.Fen’s skin was as fine as a butterfly’s wing beneath his lips.Lifestreamed in the pulsating vein.The salt of his sweat lay on Cai’stongue like a benediction.“Yes,” he managed, raising his head areluctant fraction.“Here.Alive.”
Fen’s laughter held a note of relief,as if he might have been in doubt.Gasping for breath, he rolledonto his back, pulling Cai with him to lie in his arms.“You bloodybeautiful thing.”
Chuckling, Cai wrapped an arm acrossFen’s broad chest.Unlike Cai’s it was hairless, ivory smoothexcept where the nipples rose, brown as hazelnuts, contracting evennow when Cai’s fingers brushed them.“You’re not so hideousyourself.”
“Better than yourfirst?”
“My first was…” Cai had tostop for a moment.His lungs were still labouring, his throat sore.“One of Broc’s lecherous old cronies, up against a wall when I wasbarely fifteen.So you didn’t have much competitionthere.”
“Oh.”Fen’s embracetightened.He pulled a face and gave Cai a look of wry, grimsympathy.“Sorry.”
“There were others afterhim.Better.Nobody who…” He pushed up onto one elbow, picked ahayseed out of Fen’s hair with unsteady fingers.“Nobody whoreached in and almost ripped the soul from me.Nobody who nearlystopped my heart.”
Fen took Cai’s face between his hands.Fen’s mouth was red, deliciously swollen with excitement, nothingof the wolf left in those depthless eyes but a trace of glowingamber.He drew Cai down.Their mouths met—carefully at first,almost with delicacy.Then Cai pressed passionately down.Wordslike flickering lamplight went through his mind.He wanted to saythem and was glad his tongue was paralysed, pushing against Fen’sin a silent battle that ended only when scarlet splashed across hisvision and he had to break away to breathe.
Not words he could say to aViking, not now.Maybe not ever.He mouthed them for his ownsatisfaction, invisibly against Fen’s shoulder.Sleep was washingover him, and Fen had made them comfortable in their hollow,pulling the nearest discarded cassock over both of them to keepthem warm.The words made a shape against Fen’s skin—a shape inCai’s own language, not chilly Latin, which Fen might have read andunderstood.Notte amo, te amo, te amo…
Fen groaned deeply, a sound ofexhaustion, relief, some indefinable yearning thing that made Cai’ssinuses prickle with tears.He buried his face in Cai’shair.
The lantern had almost burned out.Inits very last light, blue summer dawn shining through a gap in thebarn roof, Fen stirred and sat up.He ran his hands and then hismouth over Cai’s chest, and then when Cai was hoarsely protestingthat he couldn’t—not again, not so soon—lithely straddled hislap.
“You can.”
No point in further argument, not whenCai’s cock was rigid and straining to lift against Fen’s thigh.“What do you do to me?”
“Very little.You woke upwith this one.”
Cai laughed painfully.He didn’t doubtit.A besetting problem for him, that, sending him scrambling downto the rock pools to plunge his errant flesh neck-deep in theirchill.He’d even told Theo about it—not in so many words,stumbling, awkward—and the abbot had listened kindly, prescribedhim meditations and prayers to redirect his dreams.They’d helped alittle for a while.
But he was strongly made and full oflife, and it was so damn good to ride with his body’s energiesinstead of quelling them.To have a destination, an immediate use,for this big morning erection… Fen shifted, releasing him.Hisshaft sprang up, probing into the crack of Fen’s arse, seeking atarget Fen was already offering, his powerful crouch angled justright to receive him.Cai grabbed for the oil, and their hands metclumsily over the task of spreading it.The bottle had gone overduring their exertions last night, and there wasn’t muchleft.
“Is it enough?”Cai rasped,sitting up, easing Fen’s buttocks gently apart and drawing himdown.“Can you...”
