“Yes. God.” Her voice was low and shaky. “Please.”
He pushed his finger into her, feeling the muscles clamping down. She screamed, a breathless wail of release as her fingers lost their rhythm and she panted against his neck. It was all he could do to keep his Shadows tugging her nipples, to keep his thrusts steady as she writhed, gasping in his lap, her breath hot against his skin.
She ground down harder, and he tipped over the edge. He pumped up into her again and again before stiffening in a wave of devastating pleasure as he poured himself into her.
He wrapped his arms around her and held her while she trembled. She nuzzled into his neck, pressing soft kisses against his jaw, and he lowered himself back down to the bed, pulling her with him while still buried deep inside her. Emma was naked in his arms, her hair falling over his chest as their Shadows spun lazily together.
Zach stroked his hands along her back, feeling her breath return to normal and her heartbeat slow. “Emma, love.”
“Mmhmm.” He could feel her smiling against his chest.
“I didn’t run.”
She lifted off him and slipped to his side, propping herself up on one elbow to look down at him. “I didn’t think you would.”
He wrapped a leg over her, needing to feel her close. Why was it so hard to explain how he was feeling?
She rested her hand on his chest, right over his heart, and he wondered if she knew how fast it was beating. “I was terrified during your Healing. I’m still terrified,” he admitted in a low voice.
Emma lifted her hand to cup his cheek as she met his eyes. “I know.”
He blinked up at her. “You know?”
“Yes. When you lost your family, you ran away to your triad. You spent years focused on your work, avoiding any attachments. When James and Kay got hurt, you ran to me. When I got hurt, you would have wanted to run again.” She slid her hands up to cup his cheeks. “But you didn’t run, Zach. You’re still here.”
A shuddering breath left his lungs. Somehow, she had never doubted him.
“I can’t….” He cleared his throat. “I don’t want to lose you. I need you to be safe. Do you understand?”
Emma leaned down to press a soft kiss to his chest. “You won’t lose me.”
“Promise me.”
Emma frowned. “I can’t promise that, Zach. You and I both know how delicate and fragile life is.”
He wrapped his hand around her thigh, as if he could hold her there. “Promise me that you’ll let me protect you, then.”
She nodded slowly. “I promise that you can protect me, the same as I will protect you.”
Okay. He let out a rough breath. All he had to do now was keep her safe.
ChapterTwenty-One
James satin Kay’s car, looking out the window as they drew up outside Elizabeth’s house. What the fuck was he doing? He honestly had no idea anymore. He wished he could have just said no.
Emma had called and asked him to join them all for Sunday lunch at Elizabeth’s house. Emma who he’d been a massive dick toward. Emma whose screams had torn through Bryn’s house the previous day, ripping into James’s heart and shredding it even more than it already was. God. He wanted to hide away forever, but he couldn’t say no to Emma.
Elizabeth had come to tell him what they’d learned. How Gordon hurt Emma with his experiments. And she’d told him the words Gordon used.You are calm. Words he knew all too well.
Was that why he couldn’t remember? Did that explain the blackouts? Had Gordon hypnotized him somehow? And if he had, then how could James possibly know what was him and what was Gordon? Was he even the person he’d imagined himself to be, or was he entirely a creation made by Gordon?
James forced his shoulders down and made himself open his fist and let go of the misshapen Shadow shuriken he’d gathered. Gordon was not in the car. There was no danger. He almost heard the words—you are calm, all is well—but he forced himself to think something different.I am alive. I am safe.
And then he followed them with his new mantra.I’m going to kill him.
He had to kill Gordon. It was the conclusion he’d finally come to during the long hours of the night as Emma’s screams echoed in his head. Not for himself—God knew he deserved the hell he was living in—but for Emma. For Emma and all the other innocent people who’d been hurt.
Kay turned off the engine and they sat quietly, looking across at the charming, whitewashed cottage. How many times had he visited? Thousands? And yet the last time he’d been there, he’d kidnapped Elizabeth.
