He’d never appreciated any of it nearly enough. And he had never thanked any of those people or even told them how important they were to him. That had to change. Starting with Emma.
Still, his mistakes weren’t the only reason to be cautious. He’d realized that his Shadows recognized Emma the first time he touched her, but he hadn’t truly understood what that meant until he wrapped her in his arms. He hadn’t dreamed a simple kiss could be so utterly incandescent. Leaving him shattered and, somehow, more whole all at the same time.
It was terrifying. He had spent his life convinced that the kind of bond his parents had was too much of a risk. But now he’d felt it for himself. Now he’d held Emma in his arms, and he couldn’t imagine a world where he would never hold her again.
Zach leaned back on his arms and let his head drop. He hated uncertainty. He wanted Emma, but he didn’t want to hurt her again. He wanted to be as close to her as possible, but he didn’t want her to hurt him. He needed to get back to his triad and search for Gordon, but he didn’t want to leave Emma alone.
His phone rang and he pulled it out of his pocket. He’d been texting Kay so she was up to date with exactly how little he’d discovered about Gordon, but he’d known she would call eventually.
“Hi, Kay.”
“How are things at the seaside?” she asked.
“I’m sitting on the beach enjoying the sunshine,” he replied honestly. She didn’t need to know about the turmoil his thoughts seemed to always be in these days. “How is everyone in Wales?” God, he hoped they were okay.
“We’re good,” Kay answered quickly as if she knew that he needed that reassurance. “James is doing better,” she added.
“Hmmm.” He didn’t bother to say anything else. James had caused most of the difficulties they were now in.
“So, Zach,” Kay said, speaking as if she was picking her words carefully. “Ethan says that Emma is important to you.”
“Yes.” He’d known Ethan would tell Kay about their conversation. It had saved him from having to do it. And Emma had always been important to him. Now she was something else, something more, and he needed time to figure out exactly what that was.
God. He wanted more time with Emma. More of her laugh. More of her strength. More of the way she wrapped herself around him and made him feel whole for the first time in his life. And, as much as the thought unsettled him, he needed to be certain that when he left, she would want him to come back.
But the truth was, he’d always known he had to go back soon. Emma didn’t have any way to help them. She knew nothing about Gordon. He couldn’t justify staying, but he also knew he wasn’t ready to leave.
“Okay, good,” Kay said in his ear. She took a breath and he waited for her to tell him it was time to go back to Wales. “We—Ethan, Elizabeth, and I—have discussed this and we think you should stay down there for a few days.”
“I don’t think I should leave yet, I—” Zach paused. “Sorry, what?”
“Zach, are you at the beach waiting for Emma right now? At a time when you could be sitting behind a desk and staring at your laptop?”
He grunted his reply. She knew he was at the beach.
“Are you wearing a suit?” Kay’s voice was filled with amusement.
Where was she going with this? “You know I’m not.”
“We think you should stay there for a few days,” Kay replied. “Elizabeth has had several visions about Emma and you obviously care for her. I can’t even remember the last time you took time off work.” She paused for a moment and he knew she was preparing to say something she didn’t think he would like. “I’ve been worried about you, Zach. What happened with James….” She sighed softly. “Stay with Emma while we work out what to do next. There’s no reason you have to be here for that.”
They didn’t need to worry about him, but he wasn’t going to argue when she was giving him exactly what he wanted. “Thanks, Kay.” Damn. He really needed to be more grateful for his friends.
“Before I go, there’s something you need to know,” Kay admitted, her voice growing serious. “James is starting to remember a few things. He says that Oracle was always a front. We were chasing after the wrong thing all along.”
Zach grunted. It made sense. They’d never understood what Gordon needed a security firm for. Or why he cared about being awarded a grant.
“But then who is supporting Gordon? Surely he isn’t doing this all alone?”
Kay’s voice was stark as she replied. “The Council.”
Fuck. Part of him had already wondered. Elizabeth had been so sure that they should be cautious. And over the last few weeks, the Council had been actively obstructive and even more secretive than usual. Everything made much more sense if the Council was aware of the blood Shadows all along.
It still stung viciously. Zach had been working for them. Enabling them. Hoping to change them. He'd dedicated his life to a cause that had been hopeless from the beginning.
“There’s more,” Kay continued. “The last time they spoke, Gordon told James that he finally had a date for the meeting he wanted. A meeting with someone very close to the Prime Minister.” She huffed out a worried breath. “Gordon’s probably had that meeting already. If he got what he wanted out of it….”
She didn’t have to say the rest. Gordon had blood Shadows at his command. If he had already met with the people working closely with the Prime Minister, then it would be easy enough for him to arrange to meet with Blayne himself.
