He smiled across at her, eyes crinkling lightly in the corners, and she found herself smiling back despite herself as she replied, “I said I would.”
“Hmm.” Ethan didn’t disagree, but he didn’t seem entirely comfortable either. He pulled out a menu and glanced across the pages, although he didn’t seem to be reading any of it.
She opened hers and took a look. “So, you recommend the Eggs Benedict?”
He closed the menu and pushed it away with a grimace. “I don’t know why I’m looking in there. Yes, Eggs Benedict.”
Kay shrugged. It was pretty obvious that he had been holding the menu like a shield. Or a lifeline. “I’ll have the same.”
Ethan waved a waiter over and gave their order, and they made small talk about the river and the weather—good, safe British topics—until the eggs arrived. The muffins were hot and fluffy, the smoked salmon was rich with a hint of lemon, and the hollandaise was tart and creamy. It was just as good as he’d promised.
Ethan relaxed slowly and they settled into a more genuine conversation about his life as a paramedic and his love of rock climbing. He asked her questions about herself and what she did, but she deflected them each time, not yet sure about how to explain.
Eventually, there was a pause in the conversation. He looked away, glancing out the window and scratching a thumb over his jaw.
Kay put down her cutlery and waited until he looked back at her, his eyes widening as if he hadn’t expected her to be watching him. “You can say whatever it is,” she prompted.
He wrapped a big hand around the back of his neck, his brown eyes serious. “I’m sorry for how I behaved. I was out of line.”
She hadn’t expected another apology, but it was clear that he meant it. More than that, for such a big, competent man, he looked genuinely uncertain about sitting across the table from her. She let go of the last of her annoyance and gave him a reassuring look. “We all have bad days. And I guess it was a bit of a shock having me pointing out… things.”
He let out a slow, relieved breath as his eyes flickered over her face. “I have to be honest. I expected you’d still have a beautifully shiny, green chin. That you’d be struggling with your arm a bit more.”
Yeah. That’s what she’d thought. He really didn’t know.
In the Circle, it was drummed into you from the first day you wove a Shadow that protecting the Knowledge, protecting each other, was your most important duty. And that meant never, ever, revealing anything to the Duine—the regular people, or “norms,” if you were feeling less kind.
But this was different. Ethan needed to know. He might not be in a Circle, or have any idea about their way of life, but he certainly wasn’t Duine either. He should have already been told.
Probably the best thing to do would be to pay their bill and take him straight to David, but something in her rebelled at that idea. She wanted to be the one who showed him his heritage. She wanted to be the one who opened the door to this world for him. She felt strangely protective of him as he sat, watching her with the beginnings of a frown. She wanted him to have a choice of how to handle his position in their world without being thrust straight into the fire with no warning. And, if she was being entirely honest, she wanted the excuse to spend more time with him.
She brought her focus back to their conversation, realizing that he’d been watching her intently the whole time her mind wandered.
His eyes wrinkled at the sides as if he was holding in a laugh. “I strongly recommend you never become a professional poker player.”
“I’m trying to decide what to say.”
“I gathered that…. Should I be worried?” he asked, not quite joking, a half-smile pulling up his lips. Damn. Now that she’d stopped being irritated, he was back to being insanely attractive.
Kay’s Shadows crept up her body, tentatively reaching out toward him. She blinked, bringing her thoughts, and her Shadows, back under control once again. “No, not worried…. I can’t tell you everything, but I’ll explain what I can. The main thing is for you to know that you’re not alone.”
“I’m not sure that’s reassuring.” He chuckled. “Wait… are we talking about aliens?”
Kay rolled her eyes. “No. I mean that there are other people like you.”
His forehead furrowed. “I think this conversation is getting weird.”
“I’m one of them.”
“You’re weird?”
“No.” She laughed. “I’m one of the people like you.”
He ran a hand through his hair, leaving it in damp spikes. “Now I’m just confused.”
“I felt the way you did that Healing. And I saw you send out some of your thoughts, your Shadows, into my arm.”
He went still, his face closing down as his eyes shuttered. “I’m a paramedic. It’s scientific. I work hard, and I help people get better.” He gave a practiced smile, which never quite reached his eyes, and then, as if coming to a decision, he turned to look for a waiter. “You know, I’ve just realized that I don’t want to talk about this after all. Let’s get the bill.”
