We grab our drinks and decamp outside to one of the tables. The sun is shining, and Jay explains he is hoping I can come on board to help shape the sexual wellness project but he is open about a lack of flexibility in the budget. I reassure him that I’m keen to help, so much so that I don’t mind volunteering. And I don’t. I make enough money from my consultancy and besides this is what I’ve been itching to do. He outlines what he has done so far and explains how he hopes the programme will be rolled out initially in this youth group but then across the city, with the idea that the girls will then go on to mentor it themselves. Chloe is his first choice and I can’t help but agree. It was clear today that that girl has respect from all her peers and I suspect that she will be remarkably good at spreading the empowerment message. I cast an eye over his proposal so far and we draft some more topic areas. I am keen to get stuck in and promise to do some more once I’m home.
‘So now that’s done let’s talk about you,’ I say to Jay, who has just returned from the bar with more drinks.
‘Me? Do we have to?’
‘Oh yes.’ I say. ‘Why was that barman going to take my photo to send to your sister? It’s a little bit weird.’
‘Ha, it’s a lot weird,’ Jay responds. ‘But I’ve known Marcus for years, he’s one of my best friends. The truth is my sister and I have kind of a bet thing going on. It started out with me wanting to show her that it’s good to change things up a little. She’s always going on about my dating and this mythical list she reckons I have. So I told her I wouldn’t date for six months, and she said I could never do it, not even for six weeks, and then it kinda evolved.’
‘Evolved? List?’ He has lists?For what?
‘Ha yes, and now if I date or, you know, well, then I have to take over painting the sets for this community choir’s musical that our foster mum supports.’
‘And if you manage to keep it in your, um?’ I gesture in his general trouser direction.
‘Then themostimportant thing is she sees that change is possible and, as an added bonus, I get my house back.’
‘Eh?’
‘I currently have all her houseplants...’
‘Ahh, the cacti in the bathroom?’
‘Exactly. And boxes and boxes of her clutter that she won’t get rid of but won’t store at hers. She has promised she’ll deal with it all if I keep my vow.’
‘So, you’re going to be a monk for six months?’
‘Woah, don’t say it like that. I’m happy to have a period of celibacy, I’m not some serial seducer.'
‘Interesting, cos my sources today said youarefond of the women.’ I nod my head knowingly as I say this.
‘Are you telling me the girls said I was a bit of a ho?’ His eyebrows shoot up.
‘Whoa. They didn’t use that word and had they I would have pulled them up on it. It’s misogynistic and shaming.’
He doesn’t buy it.
‘Tell me they didn’t say I was for the streets?’ His eyes are wide and I fail to stifle my laughter.
‘In a nice way,’ I say placatingly and he chokes on his drink.
‘There is no nice way. I’m going to kill them. Is that really what they think?’
‘They said it in jest and with affection but they did say that you seem to have a different woman on your arm every week. They added you never ever brought that stuff to work, but you know, it’s a tight-knit community. Things get around.’
‘Yeah. Me by the sounds of it.’
‘Ha! Chloe pulled them up, said that wasn’t fair cos in your case you’re desperate for one to be marriage material.’ His eyes are practically out of his head now and once I get my laughter under control I add, ‘You’re a bit of a local legend apparently. They said they know women who aresokeen but fail to make the cut.’ He visibly winces as I say this.
‘Yay, Jay boy!’ Someone heads over and, spotting Jay with me, comes and greets him. It’s clear the girls are right, there is a lot of love for this man in the community. And I wonder if his promise to his sister is the only reason he rejected me? Or does he have some kind of superpower that makes him know I am never going to be good wife-and-mother material?
‘Ouch, those girls are sharp,’ he says as his friend heads inside. ‘I’d write it off as rubbish but it kind of backs up what Cass has been saying to me, I guess.’ He takes a sip of his drink and looks at me over the top of the glass. Those eyes, warm, brown like oozing puddles of melty goodness, are making me suddenly feel squirmy with lust. Nope, that is not going to help me now. I dig deep and switch my work brain back on.
‘Okay, so what’s your list?’
He widens his eyes at me in a ‘please’ gesture and takes a gulp of his pint.
‘Honestly, Cass is making it way more of a thing than it is. The girls kind of have a point, not that I’m a fuckboy –’ he adds that last bit hurriedly ‘– but that I’m a commitment guy. Yes, I date a lot but because I am looking for someone to settle down with. Someone to have a family with. Not cos I’m into numbers or conquests, the exact opposite in fact.’
