‘Of course. Being dead grown-up and sensible I’ve already booked a cab for Treporth. I’m sure they won’t object if we go via Penmenna.’
‘Fab, let’s go then.’ They both did the whole round of goodbyes, Ben giving him one of those you-lucky-sod-all-your-dreams-come-true kind of looks and Kam shook his head subtly to make sure Ben knew that was not the case. He and Pippa were not going home together. He was just making sure she got back safely. It was important to him that Ben understood that this was not some kind of post-club hook-up.
He and Pippa piled into the cab, all jumbled legs and laughter and carried on giggling at all sorts of nonsense on the journey home, when Pippa’s phone binged.
‘Oh damn.’ She checked the screen.
‘What’s wrong?
‘Oh it’s okay. It’s just Lottie has been on a Tinder date and brought her back to the flat.’
‘And you don’t like Lottie having Tinder dates?’ If Pippa had a mad crush on her flatmate then Kam may as well give up right now.
‘Oh, I don’t mind at all. She’s always much nicer after a successful date. Sometimes when she’s snappy I pull the app up for her and practically force her out the house.’ Kam breathed a sigh of relief, that did not sound like crush like behaviour. ‘It’s just that she can get quite loud, if you know what I mean.’
‘Oh, yup, I do.’
‘And as much I love her, listening to her having sex all night – and she goes on for hours. We’re not talking a five-minute quickie here. I swear the walls shake and even the seagull in the bathroom looks frightened – is my own personal idea of hell. I’d rather she stuffed my bed full of her disgusting creatures, than listen to that again. I wish she had said sooner. I would have stayed in Newquay. I guess I could try and get into Mum and Dad’s. I suspect the key is still under the squirrel. Oops, I shouldn’t have said that.’
‘You can stay at mine.’
‘Really?’ Pippa gazed up at him. ‘Are you sure?’
‘Of course, I changed it all after mum left, so it’s spankingly clean, screaming out for a visitor.’
Pippa giggled drunkenly. ‘Spanking and screaming huh?’ she said as Kam blushed. He hadn’t meant it like that. He just wanted her to feel welcome. He tried to think of some witty reply that would assure her he wasn’t attempting anything sleazy but was so flustered he couldn’t get a word out.
Pippa didn’t seem to notice and sank against him. ‘You’re such a nice man, such a nice man. How on earth are you still single, huh?’ He didn’t have an answer to that. He just let her rest against him and found himself wordlessly stroking her hair as she chattered away.
‘All the mean ones, they have women coming out of their ears, but the nice ones, the ones like you, well, it just doesn’t make sense.’ She placed a hand on his chest and sat up, as if she were trying to right herself. ‘Ooh, ooh.’
‘Oi mate, your girlfriend had better not be sick, that’s fifty quid extra if she don’t get out my cab in time. Bloody Newquay.’ The taxi driver issued his warning and then trailed off muttering about the evils of drink and the youth. Kam felt quite pleased to be called youth. Being nearly thirty he didn’t think he qualified any more but the driver was right, Pippa was looking distinctly queasy.
‘Are you okay? We can get the cab to stop if you want. Have a walk around for a couple of minutes, that would be alright, wouldn’t it?’ He addressed the latter bit of his sentence to the driver.
‘Yep, better that than my upholstery getting trashed. I’ll be keeping the meter running though.’
‘No, no need. I’m absolutely scrum-dabbi-doozily fine,’ Pippa slurred her words before lying her head back onto Kam’s chest and beginning to snore.
Chapter Thirty-five
‘Hmmm… ummm… yummm… hmmm.’ Pippa snuggled in deeper to Kam’s chest. He could have happily stayed like that for a fair bit longer, but the taxi driver was definitely not of the same cheerful disposition.
‘Mate, your girlfriend snores like a warthog. I’m sure it’s dead romantic that you don’t seem to mind, but I don’t want to be parked up all night while you look like some moony teenager and she sleeps the night away. Wake her up and get her inside. She can snore as loud as she likes in there.’ He waved his hand towards Kam’s apartment building.
‘Yep, fair point.’ Kam wanted to revel in the ‘your girlfriend’ bit but appreciated the cabbie would not be willing to indulge any more ‘teenage’ behaviour. Kam shook Pippa very gently and then, when that clearly wasn’t working, a little bit harder. She made a few more nuzzling noises and then her eyes fluttered open a bit and she smiled the biggest smile that Kam had ever seen.
‘That’s nice to wake up to. Hello, gorgeous. Mmmm.’ And then her eyes closed again.
‘Hey, hey. Pippa. We’re back at mine. We need to get out of the cab.’
‘The what… oh… oh, of course. I must have fallen asleep. Sorry.’ She smiled up sleepily at Kam and then lent herself forward to apologise to the taxi driver as well.
‘That’s alright, love, just get out now, eh,’ the taxi driver said, considerably nicer to Pippa than he had been to Kam.
‘Oh yes, yes, of course. That I can do. Ooh…’ Kam opened the car door and the cold air hit them both like a slap in the face. Summer may be here but nearly three in the morning was still pretty chilly. Pippa missed her footing, as she climbed down from the cab and stumbled slightly with Kam catching her arm and helping her up. ‘I think I might still be a bit drunk… yep, def a bit wobbly still. Sorry.’
‘Don’t be daft, you’re fine. Let’s get you to bed.’ Kam made sure she was steady on her feet.
