CHAPTER1
“This is quaint.”
Lauren Hall reached across the console to grab her boyfriend’s hand. “Moose Hollow never disappoints at Christmas.” The closer they’d gotten to town, the faster her heart beat. Coming back after a five-year self-imposed exile was scarier than the first time she’d presented in front of the creative board. All those eyes looking at her, judging her designs and concepts–she shuddered at the memory of how small she’d felt, how young and naïve.
Of course, they’d loved her way of looking at things and were excited about the fresh air she breathed into the department. But that was beside the point. The point was that coming home was hard–especially when she’d left half her heart with the boy next door.
She cleared her throat and changed her thoughts. After all, thoughts that ran willy-nilly were ammunition for self-defeat. If there was one thought pattern that she’d learned to control, it was any and all thoughts that pointed to Jacob Morris.
Gah! His name was never to be spoken out loud, thought silently in the sacred space of her own mind, or written.
“Oh, look at the decorations,” she said to distract herself.
The old-fashioned black lamp posts wore wreathes with giant red bows. At night, they would sparkle with twinkle lights. Snow piled knee-high along the side of the road like a welcoming crew. People bustled from the town square where the annual white elephant gift exchange just wrapped up. It was a fun way for people to give to others–especially if they didn’t have someone to spend Christmas morning opening presents with and drinking eggnog.
They slowed down to let Mr. Diamonte cross the street. He wore a navy suit and black tie with a charcoal overcoat and kept his head down. His shoulders slumped and his nose was red. It was sad to see him without his wife since she’d died a while back. Lauren had read about it online. Mrs. Diamonte was famous–the face of the jewelry store and the envy of women everywhere because she was constantly draped in diamonds and emeralds. The gift exchange was her idea, and Lauren suspected that the jewelry family quietly provided gifts for those who couldn’t afford to bring one. She craned her neck as they moved on, but didn’t see any of his kids with him.
“It’s so… cute.” Foster smirked at a man dressed as Santa, ringing a bell to call for donations. “I didn’t know they still did that.”
Seeing her hometown through Foster’s world-traveled eyes had her cheeks heating with embarrassment. Santa’s suit had seen better days, as had the paint on the lampposts that peeled. The faded but serviceable coats locals wore looked tired in the bright sunlight. The crowd he ran with, up-and-coming lawyers, doctors, tech business start-up owners, and the like, wouldn’t be caught dead in last season’s threads. The expectation fanned out to include Lauren, and she had a bag of the hottest eye shadows, cute but impractical shoes, and silky pajamas that made goosebumps appear when she put them on; they were so cold. Not that those people saw her in her pajamas; she just felt like sweats were part of the girl she’d left behind in Moose Hollow and not the woman she’d become.
Foster snorted a laugh and pointed at a couple standing on the street corner, singing. The man had a beat-up guitar. The chalkboard sign invited people to church services later that day. They smiled at one another, that kind of smile that said they were madly in love.
Lauren bit the inside of her cheek. The singing preacher was well-known in and out of town. He had a popular YouTube channel, and his wife’s work with the local youth had garnered national media attention two years ago.
She didn’t bother to tell Foster. He wasn’t into that kind of thing. Her brow furrowed as she doubted her decision to come home and bring him along. She’d hoped this trip would be a bonding experience, a chance to share more of her past so they could take the next step in their relationship. A step that should include a ring and wedding bells.
The GPS told him to turn at the next left, and he signaled. “Hey, don’t you worry about me.” He interpreted her concern as being for him. “I brought my laptop. I’ll be able to stay on top of my workload and not miss a thing.” He dropped her hand and used both to maneuver around a large patch of ice at the top of her street. “I guess there’s no budget for proper street care in small towns.”
Lauren glanced out her window so she wouldn’t have to come up with a response. Foster was the top junior executive at Marchland International. He did important work–although she wasn’t quite sure what that was exactly. His job description read more like a legal journal than it did a LinkedIn profile. They’d gone to his company party the night before, which was why they were on the road on Christmas Day.
The familiar houses ticked by too fast. She gripped the seat. She wasn’t ready to face the past. To face him. That’s why she’d invited Foster–as a shield to hide behind. No woman wanted to face her ex while remaining single. Not that Jacob was ever really hers–gah! Don’t think of his name!
They pulled into her parents’ drive, and Foster cut the engine. He turned and captured her attention with his icy blue eyes. She plunged into their intensity, grateful for the escape from her own near panic attack. “You know, it doesn’t matter to me where you came from. You’ll always be Luscious Lauren in my book.” He kissed the back of her hand.
Of all the nicknames she’d been given over the years–Luscious Lauren wasn’t her least favorite–it wasn’t the worst one either, so she let it go. “My parents are going to love you.” She grinned. Foster was a charmer. She counted on him laying it on thick today and impressing her family. Heck, he could charm the entire town and make her look good, and she’d call this Christmas a success.
Foster cupped her face and kissed her softly. “I love you, baby.”
Usually, she would giggle against his lips and fall into kissing him until she forgot her worries, but she couldn’t do it. Her brain wasn’t in the game of love today. “I love you too.” She pecked his cheek and leaned back to take off her seatbelt.
They climbed out of the car, and, out of habit, Lauren’s eyes immediately cut to the house on the right. Standing in front of the Morris home was a beautifully made snowman. He was expertly proportioned, with a red and blue plaid scarf around his neck. His face was bare–no button eyes or carrot nose. The clean lines in the snow, the ones made from rolling the balls of snow, told her exactly who had made that snowman.
Seeing movement in the window, she caught sight of a tall, handsome guy watching her just before the curtain dropped into place. Her heart lurched. Jacob? Memories assaulted her like ten-year-old boys on a snowball ambush mission.
Tripping through Jacob’s front door and into the smell of freshly baked banana bread, and sneaking out her window and into his yard for night games. Laying on the front lawn under a sprinkler during a heat wave. Making mud pies. Trading lunches while waiting for the school bus. Band concerts. That one awful high school play they both had to do in order to graduate. Cheering at the football games. Watching Jacob catch the ball and score the winning touchdown. Curling up in his front room with her favorite book.
“Baby?” Foster motioned from the front of the car. “Are you coming?”
Lauren blinked. Wow! So much for controlling her thoughts. She put on a smile. Backsliding with so many memory triggers around was to be expected. The important thing was that she knew Jacob was her past and Foster was her future.
Before she could take Foster’s outstretched hand, the front door flew open, and Mom rushed toward her. “Lauren!” Mom yelled. “I thought you’d never get here.” She wore a checkered apron with gingerbread men as pockets, and her recently dyed hair was shiny with no gray roots.
Lauren laughed. “It’s barely ten.”
“And the day is almost over!” Mom scolded playfully as she scooped Lauren into her hug. She smelled like sugar and cinnamon and something bright and cheerful. Her hug was so familiar it went all the way through Lauren and whispered: You’ve come home, I’ve missed you, and you’re always a part of my heart.
Lauren laughed out loud at the freedom she felt, even as her throat clogged with emotion. This space was the safest on the entire planet.
