“What did he say?” Maddie whispered, her eyes round with worry or curiosity, Clover wasn’t sure which.
“He kissed me,” she replied shyly.
Maddie melted, resting her cheek on the palm of her hand and her elbow on the table. “That’s so sweet.”
“He is.”
“So you’re skipping The Pantry to see him?”
Clover nodded. “Half a shift. He’s got a light workout this afternoon, and this morning he’s helping his brother with his company. I’ll run over to the Pantry for an hour and stock shelves. Can you maybe come in to help Jane out with serving?”
Maddie sat up tall. “Sure.” She’d volunteered before and knew where things were, so Clover didn’t feel like she was leaving Jane in a lurch. Maddie was hesitant with some of the rougher-looking regulars, but between Maddie and Jane, stomachs would be filled.
“Great.” Clover got up and dumped her half-eaten bowl of cereal down the disposal. Skipping work didn’t feel quite right and had dampened her appetite. Sure, people took days off all the time, but there were people counting on Clover at The Pantry. They were most comfortable with her because she understood where they were in life and didn’t judge. Her stomach spun the Sugar Pops like it was trying to make cotton candy out of them. She closed her eyes and leaned against the sink.
“Are you okay?” asked Maddie as she came around the bar, her empty bowl in hand.
“I hate letting people down.” She took a deep breath in through her nose. Curse that Dustin; this was twice in as many days that he’d put her out of her comfort zone.
“Who are you letting down?” Maddie asked.
“Jane, the regulars, you.”
Maddie grabbed her arm. “Clover! It’s one afternoon. The whole world isn’t going to end because you decided to play mini golf with your new boyfriend.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” she protested weakly.
Maddie took her by the shoulders. “Go. Have fun. You’re not flaking on anyone. You’re telling Jane, and you got your shift covered. You’re allowed to enjoy life a little, you know?”
“That’s the problem. I’m enjoying this far too much for it to be real. I’ve been flying since the stadium last night—at some point, I’m going to crash. I know this. I know it as deeply as I want to be with Dustin today, and it scares the heck out of me.”
Maddie tipped her head in sympathy. “What’s the point of flying if you can’t enjoy it?”
“But—the crash?”
“Feel it when it comes—if it comes. You don’t know for sure you’re going to crash.”
Clover bit back the argument that she could feel the crash on the horizon. There was no logical explanation for her feelings, just the sense of impending doom if she stopped to think about breaking her regular schedule. “Yeah. Okay.” She checked the clock. “I’m going to shower and get ready.”
“That’s the spirit. Wanna borrow my slip-ons?”
“Can I? They’d look great with the skirt I was thinking of wearing.”
“The navy one?” Maddie’s eyes lit up.
“You know it.”
Maddie clapped her hands. “Yes! And I get to pull your hair up in a faux bob I saw on YouTube.”
Clover rolled her eyes. “Have at it.”
“Go. Go. Go.” Maddie shoved her toward the bathroom.
The warm water was comforting, and as Clover worked the shampoo into her hair, she repeated Maddie’s advice over and over again. She was not being a flake. Vacation days were a normal part of life, and she was now a normal woman living a normal life and doing something normal like dating an MLB player. The fate of the world didn’t rest on her shoulders.
But even after the conditioner rinsed down the drain, the feeling that she was missing something important held on.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
