He didn’t want to camp in the woods, near the battlefield, and know that she was anxiously waiting for him to return, hoping that it was alive and not dead.
He didn’t want to worry her, yet there was nothing Kaiden could do to ease that worry. He was going into battle when the sun rose, and this could perhaps be the last time he saw his wife like this, holding her like this as she slept on.
What would she do if he didn’t return? He knew he didn’t have to ask his father to care for her. His father was going to do that regardless.
But after some time, would Ferra find another Scot to warm her bed and her heart? Would Kaiden become a distant memory after some time?
He didn’t like the idea of another man in Ferra’s bed, but if something happened in the coming days, he would want her to be happy.
It was all he would want for the wife he hadn’t asked for but now couldn’t live without. Leaning down, Kaiden brushed his lips across her temple, grinning as she stirred but didn’t wake. “I love ye, lass,” he whispered. “Ye dinnae know wot ye have done tae me, but ye make me a better man. Ye make me want tae come home.”
Kaiden buried his face in her hair, breathing in her scent and trapping it deep down so that it would remain with him after he left in the morning. He wanted to come home. He wanted to survive so that when his horse rode into the courtyard in a few days, it wouldn’t have his body draped over the saddle, but anxious eyes seeking out the woman he currently held in his arms.
Then it would take him some time to break away from this bed when he did return.
16
Today was the day.
Ferra gripped her hands tightly together as she stood at the top of the stairs, waiting for Kaiden to step out of their chamber and head down to the great hall, where he would be greeted by the waiting warriors.
After a sleepless night, she felt frazzled and worried for what was to come today. This didn’t stop when Kaiden rode out of the courtyard.
No, it only would begin then.
Ferra had on her warmest dress and comfortable boots, her pack stashed under the bed where she knew Kaiden wouldn’t go looking. She had a few days’ worth of food already squirreled away, along with the medical supplies that she hoped she wouldn’t need.
Her husband wouldn’t be the only one riding out today.
Finally, Ferra heard Kaiden’s boots on the stone floor and straightened, her throat clogging with emotion as he came into view. He looked every inch the warrior that he was, from the severe way he wore his hair off his face to the sword strapped to his back. He had leather braces on his forearms, used to deflect the sword blows, and his boots were higher than average, covering nearly his entire lower legs.
He was battle-ready.
“Wife,” he stated, stopping before Ferra.
Ferra stepped forward, placing her hand on his chest and feeling the rapid beat of his heart under her palm. “Husband. I pray that ye will have the strength, quickness, and perseverance tae win this battle for our clan, our home.”
He captured her hand in his, squeezing it lightly. “I will come home tae ye, lass. Dinnae worry.”
Oh, she was worried plenty. Clearing her throat, Ferra reached up and pulled him down for a quick kiss. “Ye better, Kaiden.”
Kaiden pressed his forehead to hers, and she breathed in his scent, tears threatening her eyes. This was not going to be the last time she saw him, but it still felt like he wasn’t going to come home. She wanted to cling to him, to hold him on this step and away from danger.
But when Kaiden pulled away, Ferra didn’t try to stop him, instead tucking her hand inside of his bicep so that they could walk down the stairs together. She wanted to tell him how she felt, that she had fallen in love with him, but the words froze in her throat each time she tried to form them.
By the time they reached the great hall, her chance had passed. Ferra bent her head as Kaiden pressed his lips to her temple before turning toward the waiting warriors, the families gathered forced to wait until the men had made it to the courtyard before following close behind. Ferra found herself just as anxious as she watched Kaiden pull himself up into the saddle, wrapping her arms around her waist. “For McGregor!” he called out, hitting his chest with his fist once.
“For McGregor!” the rest called out after their laird.
Kaiden’s eyes found hers, and he gave her a slight smile before nudging his horse into movement and turning away from her.
Ferra wanted to run after him, wanted to pull him back from the fray, but she did nothing. Instead, she watched him disappear through the gates, the crowd moving with the horses so that they would see them all the way to the village border.
While she would have joined them, Ferra had other plans.
Once the last warrior moved through the gates, she turned to the keep, picking up her skirts as she hurried through the great hall and up the stairs to their chamber. Pushing open the door, Ferra stepped in and was immediately overwhelmed by the lingering scent of her husband.
Oh, she already missed him!
