Ava nodded and dried her eyes, then smiled at him and squeezed his hand.
“Alastair,” Caitlyn said softly.
He looked up and gazed at her.God, she is so lovely,he thought, as his treacherous man’s body reacted the way nature had intended it to.
“Give yourself peace,” she told him, and her tone was infinitely gentle. “You were not to know. These things take time. I rescued a puppy once from a man who was beating him. He was terrified of me at first and it took him a long time to trust me, but eventually he did, and now he is my best friend. His name is Broch, and he is absolutely huge,” she smiled. “What I mean is that you need to go slowly with these things—even with people.”
He gazed into her eyes, not wanting to look away, then he said softly, “Thank you, Caitlyn. You are very wise.”
She laughed. “Now there is something I have never been accused of before!” She glanced at Ava, who had dozed off. “Let her sleep, sometimes it is best,” she whispered, and they left the room. Outside, he took her arm and stayed her for a moment, and she looked up at him questioningly. He felt awkward and clumsy with this kind woman whom he had treated so unkindly.
“I do not know how to say this,” he said gruffly. “I am not a man who is very good with words but I wanted to express my gratitude to you for helping my sister today. I have not seen her so happy since that awful day. Thank you, Caitlyn.”
She inclined her head graciously and smiled at him. “It was my pleasure,” she replied. “Your sister is a fine woman and I knew as soon as I looked at her that we were going to become friends. She told me that your friends and family are a bunch of rogues. I cannot wait to find out more.”
He laughed. “That we are!” he admitted. “I have to go. Have a wonderful day, Caitlyn, and thank you.” He bowed, then, to his own surprise, he bent his head and kissed her lips. It was meant to be no more than a peck, but it lasted a second too long for a friendly kiss. However, she did not back away, since it was pleasant and not passionate, and he kept his hands by his sides.
Caitlyn wished that he would show this side of himself more often; it was his best.
9
The Rogues’ Gallery
When Caitlyn went to bed that night, she could not get Alastair out of her mind. He had been gruff, unapproachable, and argumentative at first, but he had softened a little towards her, especially today, when she and Ava had bonded so quickly.
Caitlyn had never met a real man before except for her father and a few of her cousins, but her father didn’t count and none of her cousins looked like Alastair.
She pictured him in her mind; his strong, broad shoulders, muscled arms and calves, and his beautiful, brooding face with its piercing brown eyes. She had seen his torso only once, the day before, when he had been chopping logs, and the play of rippling muscles underneath his skin as he wielded the heavy ax, and the way he wiped the runnels of sweat from his face with his forearm, had almost turned her knees to rubber. She did not know the name for this strange feeling, but it was very enjoyable.
When she closed her eyes, it seemed that the dream began almost immediately.
She was walking along the turrets at her own castle, her favorite place in the world, where she loved to stand and dream while looking out over the patchwork landscape. She heard heavy footsteps on the stairs behind her. She turned to see Alastair, wearing his usual grim expression, staring at her as if trying to pin her to the wall with his fierce gaze. He came towards her, and although she backed up then sidestepped, he countered her every movement with one of his own, cutting off her escape route. Eventually she stood immobile and became resigned to whatever he was going to do to her.
“Are you afraid of me?” he asked softly. She nodded, unable to speak, then he did the last thing she expected—he gathered her into his arms. He was warm and solid, and she sighed with contentment as she relaxed into his embrace, feeling as if she could have stayed there forever, sheltered, protected, and cherished. She felt his cheek on her hair, his hand on the back of her head, gently holding it against his body.
She savored the rise and fall of his broad chest as he breathed, and the strong, steady thud of his heartbeat, which had become faster because of her nearness. She could feel something else...a hard bulge was pressing against her stomach, and she knew that it was connected to the way he was feeling.
He sighed, and looked into her eyes. His were not piercing anymore; they had become soft and loving.
“Caitlyn,” he murmured. Then his lips parted, and his face came towards hers, closer, closer. She felt his hand cup her breast, his thumb passing gently over her sensitive nipple, and she raised her lips to his. “I wish we could be together. I wish I could make you mine.” His deep voice was soft with longing.
Then, at last, he kissed her, and thrust his tongue into her mouth as he strained her against him. She felt her heartbeat speeding up as he pushed her against the rough gray stones of the wall, and he rubbed himself against her over and over again with a delightful friction. She felt something strange and delightful in the core of her body, and she knew with an inner certainty that she was about to discover the secret to the mystery of love...
She woke up, not gently, but abruptly, as though a sudden noise had startled her, although the whole house was silent. Still only half awake, she looked for him in the shadows cast by the guttering candles, but he was nowhere to be seen. It had been a dream, but a delicious one, and she realized that she was trembling all over. But she was not cold; in fact, she was more joyful and contented than she had ever been before. She smiled and went straight back to sleep.
The next morning was Sunday, and all the inhabitants of the castle, except Ava, heard Mass in the castle chapel. As Laird, Alastair sat at the front, and Caitlyn sat beside him as his guest. She had no idea how much he wanted to take her hand or put his arm around her waist, but of course he would never do that, especially not in church, but he was intensely aware of her nearness.
Since there was a compulsory twelve-hour fast before Holy Communion, they were both ravenous when they came out, but one of Alastair’s little kindnesses was to have oatcakes and milk placed at the chapel door for that very reason so that everyone could help themselves and not faint before breakfast. They took an oatcake each and one extra then went to see Eileen, who had received Communion in her room.
She was delighted to see them, and as she watched them she could see the current between them by the language of their bodies, the little nuanced glances, and the way they stood slightly too close to each other. Moreover, Alastair’s
expression had brightened a little and much of his sternness had gone. He even smiled occasionally. Eileen knew without being told that something was going on between them, and that the strangest thing was that neither of them knew anything about it!
“How are you, Milady?” Alastair asked politely, the corners of his mouth twitching in a slight smile.
“I feel so much better that I think I may get out of bed tomorrow!” Eileen said happily. “Teresa has gone home to see her family but she got me some material to start another dress, and a lovely romance from the library. I could not be more content.”
“I am so glad,” Alastair replied, and for once his voice sounded heartfelt.
