‘Well, here’s the kicker … ’ he smiled. ‘I am going to be my own boss. I’m starting my own business.’
Silence permeated the room and Greg shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Eventually he cleared his throat. ‘I have been playing around with this idea of starting my own company, a photography business. You know, ever since I sold the Flatiron shot. It’s what I love doing and … ’ he shrugged. ‘I figured that there was real potential there.’
He studied her face, hoping for encouragement, or any hint in her expression that she approved of his decision.
‘Photography?’ Karen said quietly. She cast her eyes down, as if she was having a problem meeting his gaze.
‘Yes,’ he said with resolution.
‘A photography business?’ she clarified, still not looking at him. ‘Freelance, you mean?’ She finally turned her eyes towards him, and even though she was questioning him to clarify his intentions, he noticed that her expression was full of worry, and her voice lacked confidence.
‘Well, I suppose you could describe it like that. But really, I have a lot of ideas about growing my client base—’
‘You mean beginning,’ she said, interrupting him.
‘What?’
‘Beginning your client base … starting it,’ she said bluntly. ‘You don’t have a client base to grow.’
He shifted in his seat as he considered the reality of her statement. ‘Well, yes, but all entrepreneurs have to start somewhere and, like I said, I have a lot of ideas. The only way to go is up. And I think I can really do something with this, Karen, be successful, but also really enjoy it too. You know … Mom always thought that I had a knack for this sort of thing; she thought that—’
‘Greg, come on,’ Karen interjected sharply. ‘Of course your mother said she loved your photos. All mothers love their kids’ work. Have you ever seen a mother who didn’t put up a finger painting on their refrigerator? They’re supposed to do that.’ She sat back and sighed. ‘I really wish you would have talked to me before you did something this rash. Do you think that you can go back to Dave and apologise? Say you changed your mind?’
Greg recoiled at her words. He had to admit they stung. She was more or less calling him a delusional Mommy’s boy; she had taken everything completely out of context.
‘That’s not what I was trying to say, Karen. No, I can’t go back. And yes, I’m sorry. Maybe I should have said something about this, but I thought you’d be happy I was out of the rat race. I believe in it and I know I can make this work. Come on, you’ve always had faith in me. And I’m sorry, I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you, but I wanted it to be a surprise. Now we will all have more time together. And time is important Karen, now more than ever.’ He wished that he didn’t sound so pleading, as if he was asking for permission.
‘I understand what you’re saying and that’s all fine and good but Greg, New York is an expensive city. I don’t think I have to tell you that.’
‘Come on now. Of course I know that. And I have thought about this, we will be fine. You still have your salary, and I have a nice nest egg – it will keep us in a good position until the business grows. OK, of course it means we’ll have to cut back in a couple of areas, a few austerity measures, as they say, but nothing serious. And it will all be worth it in the end.’
‘Oh, I know what it means,’ she said drolly. ‘I’m well aware we are certainlynottalking St. Barts for the holiday.’
‘Karen …’
‘Anyway,’ she continued quickly. ‘I have to get back to the office. One of us has to work.’
‘Now come on…’
She breathed heavily, as if she suddenly felt the weight of the world rest upon her shoulders. She looked around at their well-appointed living room, as if trying to figure out what they’d need to sell first.
‘Baby, come on. Think positive. We are going to be fine.’ Greg stood up and reached for her. ‘I have faith in myself, I believe in what I can do. I thought you did too?’ He hated how pleading he sounded. This is not how he pictured this conversation.
Karen locked her eyes on his face and she said, blankly, ‘I do have faith in you, but I also thought that you considered me an equal partner in this relationship.’
‘I do!’ he said defensively.
‘I’m not so sure, Greg. You just put a lot of responsibility on my shoulders and you didn’t even care about my opinion enough to consult me before you did it. You justassumed.’
She had just turned the tables on him, making him out to be some sort of loser, some guy who sits back and does nothing and expects to be supported. She knew him better than that!
‘I did no such thing,’ he said. Or did he? He took a deep breath, preparing what he was going to say next, but she held up a hand. He had seen her use that move on the people she was in charge of at work, it was an icy gesture that immediately silenced the other person. It worked.
‘I don’t have time for this now. I have to get back. We can talk about it later, OK?’ she said, turning her back to him and walking back towards the door. She looked over her shoulder quickly. ‘Oh, your dad called – there’s a message on the machine. You probably should call him back.’
Moments later, Greg heard the door close behind her, leaving him in frigid silence.
His formerly good mood had been crushed and now he was left with a sinking pit of worry. He stared at the phone, hoping that his father’s call wasn’t the harbinger of more bad news. He didn’t think he would be able deal with that right now.
