I bet that’s real marble. What the hell am I doing here?
Penny was still asking herself that question as she sat in the living room skimming through magazines as Kate got Toby settled down again. He’d woken fifteen minutes earlier and seemed fractious.
“Sorry about that. He can be a bit cranky when he has an accident,” Kate commented as she took a seat beside Penny.
They looked at each other in silence, their earlier exchange the proverbial elephant in the room.
Finally Kate broke the discomfort. “Look, you know me. I can’t hold my tongue and discretion isn’t my strong point so I’m just going to say it.”
“Kate –”
“You aren’t happy Pen,” Kate’s eyes began to smart with tears.
Penny felt the sting of panic well-up inside her. She couldn’t handle tears, especially not Kate’s.
“You haven’t been for a long time, and I’m worried about you.” She locked her gaze on Penny. “Ever since Tim died you’ve been a different person. You barely laugh. You don’t go out. All you ever do is work. You even stopped calling Tim’s parents.”
Penny’s eyes widened. “How on earth did you know that?”
“Mrs. Walters gave me a call when you stopped returning hers. She’s worried about you too Pen. We all are.”
“You don’t have to worry I’m fine,” Penny replied tersely. She hated people talking about her behind her back. “Since when do you and Colleen talk to one another? I don’t remember either of you ever doing that when Tim was alive.”
“Don’t,” Kate cautioned, sensing the shift. “Don’t make this into some kind of conspiracy. I gave her my number at Tim’s funeral. She kept it. When you stopped calling and returning their calls she was worried, so she contacted me. How else was anyone going to know if you were alright? I barely know half the time.”
“That’s not fair Kate. You know I can’t stand to see you cry,” Penny blubbered as they embraced.
“I can’t help it. I’m just so worried about you and I love you.”
“I love you too, and I’m sorry I made you worry. It was just … easier to keep to myself after Tim’s death. It didn’t hurt so much when there weren’t so many reminders of when I was happy.”
Kate held her at arm’s length. “Tim wouldn’t have wanted this. You know that. You need to let yourself be happy again.”
“I know,” Penny replied as she wiped her cheek with the back of her hand.
“He wouldn’t have wanted you to stop living.”
The two women fell into another embrace, the comfort of their friendship easing away the tension of the years of imposed emotional distance.
They were still sniffling when Ian and his guest arrived.
