Kraven always played dirty, and this was no different. Yet I couldn’t stop myself from getting to him as fast as I could. I didn’t want to miss a second of his performance. His music always had the power to bring me to my knees.
Julius was just as talented, and he played with his heart, while Kraven played with his soul. Their talent came from different parts of them, which made sense since Melody taught it to them that way.
Once I stepped into his bedroom, I immediately recognized the lone wolf that seemed to be lying dormant these past couple of months. He was showing me that it still lived inside him, but when it was just him and me, we were a pack.
His jet-black hair and bright-blue eyes were still such contrasting traits that he wore like a striking paradox. It was his icy stare that proved he wasn’t happy where I’d been or who I’d been with.
Did he know Julius and I fooled around? Could he see it on me? Feel it, maybe?
Again, I couldn’t look away, mesmerized by the devastatingly broken man in front of me. I stood there captivated, with tears suddenly streaming down my face. We locked stares. Through his music, we spoke all the words, we said all the things, and we saw all the signs, breathing it all in. Igniting our connection, our passion, our love…
I watched him play with such fierce perfection, wanting to prove his role in my life and how he was there for me. It was only him and me, and I understood every last note. It was this raw, desperate cry for me…
Our memories together tore through my mind at the same rapid speed.
“Hey, Kitty, weekend custody belongs to me now.”
“You’re going to actually speak to me.”
“What, Kitty? Cat got your tongue, or do you only reserve your voice for screaming my name? Is that how I make you purr?”
I ripped through every last one until the song was coming to an end, triggering me in the worst of ways. And just like that, he played the last key, and it echoed through the small space between us, through all the walls in the house, and even to Julius, who was now standing behind me with his pain burning a hole in my back.
Before I could open my mouth, Kraven bit out, “Did Kitty have a nice day today?”
Instant chills coursed through my body, freezing every nerve and muscle, leaving every part of me unable to move. It didn’t help my disposition, although there was no controlling the emotions he was dragging out of me. The only sound I could hear was my pounding heart, while my mind collided with the past and the present.
It didn’t take long for the truth to set us all free.
“Don’t do this, Kraven. Please…” I begged him, ready to get on my knees if I had to.
Nothing could have prepared me for the string of events that happened next. Not my past. Notourpast. Not his anger or his hatred.
Or his love for me, destroying us all.
My vision tunneled, and all the blood drained from my face as I continued to watch him. Waiting for his next attack. For a few seconds, time seemed to stand still. No one moved, including me. An undeniable sense of awareness saturated the room and penetrated our bones.
I couldn’t help but silently pray for a world where we could all be together, where I didn’t have to choose, and where we could all just be happy. It was such a foreign concept, but what do you do when you’re in love with two men?
How did I choose between two people who made me feel whole? It was nearly impossible to even contemplate. Losing one of them would be like losing a part of myself, and I didn’t know how that would work out for the person I decided to be with. Now there was a baby…
How do we make any of this work?
They were going to ask me to pick between them. It was inevitable. Everything was leading to this moment when I’d have to destroy one of them. The power I held at that moment was wild, and coming from someone who was never in control, I was lost with it.
The despair in my emotions recoiled off the walls that were now caving in on me. My heart jackhammered its way up through my throat.
“Kraven, please…” I begged again, fully aware it was useless.
Our pain mixed as one, belonging together. It was entwined through the past and the present, the good and the bad, his darkness, his demons, through the life and future we might never have.
I didn’t stop my tears. I couldn’t. Not when I was with them. Not right now, when they seemed to matter the most.
I was terrified of the future, and it was the only thing that would make this fair.
Kraven stared at me, fully aware of what sentiments he was pulling out of my body. His truths were killing me far more than all the lies he could put together. All the times he pushed me away, all the times he drew me toward him in the same way he was right then.
I was always the one in the middle, and it was exactly where I was at the moment.
