They had cuddled like this when they were younger, but it had been different then. Innocent. The way her body reacted when he ran his hand down her arm before pressing his mouth to the back of her neck was not innocent. Nor was the way that she clutched her mug in white-knuckled hands, struggling to maintain easy breathing as he slid the straps of her top and bra out of the way to kiss across her bare shoulders.
“I missed this.” The words were so quiet that if it hadn’t been for the rumble of his voice against her back, she could have convinced herself that he hadn’t spoken at all.
She shivered a little.Me, too, she thought, swallowing hard. “I was always a little surprised that you never came after me.”
He made a soft sound as he traced small circles over thesoft skin beneath her navel. It felt almost as good as it did when he kissed her there while he was on his knees. “Why were you surprised?”
“You were so obsessed with me. I couldn’t believe you’d let me go.”
“Would you have come back?” She felt his hands lace over her stomach, as if even now, he was driven by the urge to claim and possess. “If I had tracked you down and shown up at your door five years ago, six years ago, would you have returned here with me?”
“N-no,” she admitted shakily. “I would have run.”
“That’s why I didn’t.” His fingers dipped beneath her top. “I don’t like to rush and I didn’t want to scare you.”
“No, you just sent a private investigator to take photos of me that you did god-knows-what with.” Jay twisted around to look at him. “What if I had been seeing someone?”
“I would have persuaded him to give you to me instead.”
“And you think that’s rational? You think that’s something ordinary people justdoto other people because they feel like it? Trade them like fucking stocks?”
“Anyone who would give you up either doesn’t deserve you or can’t afford you, and since supply informs demand—” He flicked his fingers over her bare hip, each touch a sparkling constellation of fire and heat. “It looks like I control the marketandthe supply.”
“I find it insulting that you think I would have just stood around passively and let you do this absolutely insane thing you just said.”
Nicholas laughed. “You just told me that all your exes liked you because they saw you as pretty and uncomplicated, and howmuch that pissed you off. But that’s not why I like you, Jay. And you’ll never have to fight against your own happiness to prove yourself to me.”
I don’t even remember the last time I was happy, thought Jay. Except that she could, and it had been today.
With him.
She shoved against that thought so viciously that she physically recoiled. “I didn’t realize I was being publicly traded.”
“You traded ten million for me.” He flicked the snap of her jeans. “Turnabout is fair play.”
Fuck. She squirmed again and this time, his arms tightened, holding her firmly within the cradle of his spread thighs. “You put me on a pedestal,” she said haltingly, feeling much too hot under these too-bright lights. “Maybe you can’t help that. But the way you love me—I’m not perfect. I’m nobody’s angel. And you’ll begrudge me for not being the person you want me to be when public opinion of me drops.”
“It doesn’t work like that.”
“Nick—”
“No, Jay. I’m telling you right now,it doesn’t work like that.”
He nudged at her shoulder, making her look back at him, where she was greeted with a kiss so thorough that the alcohol coating her tongue seemed to catch fire. When he lifted his hips, she was forced into an ungainly sprawl, and when she rolled over to steady herself, she kicked the blanket to the floor and nearly knocked over her mostly-untouched coffee.
Nicholas looked up at her heatedly, and the flexing of his thighs beneath hers caused a ripple of sensation that pooled like ice between her legs and made her breath come shorter.
“You’re perfect,” he breathed, “for me.”
“No,” Jay said. “I’m not.”
Both his hands were under her top now. Slowly, he drew his thumbs over the tips of her breasts, his eyes firmly trained on her face. “Too bad. I want you anyway.”
“Nick—” It came out as a gasp.
“That’s why I said you could hurt me.” He sucked hard on her neck, stroking her nipples until they began to feel tender. “Nothing you could do to me would hurt more than leaving.”
“I want to stay,” she breathed.
