“I like it here,” Jay said, though this didn’t feel very true at the moment. Her mouth was dry from fear and she could hear her heart pounding in her ears like a timpani drum. “And it seemed like it would mesh with my current skillset. I have experience in overseeing projects and delegating assignments. And I work well with people—even if they’re difficult to work with.”
Even if I’m going to kill them later.
She glanced at Arthur’s face. It gave away nothing.
“I, um, also enjoy a challenge?”
“Directing is quite different from providing administrative support,” Arthur said.
Hearing her own doubts spoken out loud by someone else, no matter how gently, was devastating. Why had Nicholas done this to her? It was just another way she was going to fail.
“I know I don’t have a lot of experience but sometimes that can be a good thing,” she said, a little desperately. “When there’s no expectations, there’s no bad habits to break. You can just grow naturally into the role and pick up all the new skills like it was made for you.”
“I suppose that’s true.” He considered her, not unkindly. “Assuming one can step up to the task.”
And I’m not. Her shoulders sank despairingly. She was reading that loud and clear.
They discussed the role a little more. It was a very polite rejection. He kept emphasizing the word “expectations,” as if to drill in the fact that she wouldn’t be able to fulfill them, while Jay nodded and smiled and longed for nothing more than to flee from the room.
By the time the “quick chat” petered out into actual small talk, she was exhausted. Arthur asked her questions about San Francisco, and though she answered, she couldn’t remember anything she actually said. She thought she might have heard herself telling him about crying at the apple picture, which would have been even more humiliating, but at that point it was hard to be sure what she was saying because her brain had shut off from panic overload.
“I’ll reach out with next steps, Jay,” he said, concluding both the meeting and her silent torture. “But I really do appreciate you raising your hand for this role. I always tell people that youhave to be your own advocate. Nobody else will make that push for you.”
I know one person who would. Right off a cliff.
She looked hard at Nicholas as she stumbled out of the room. He was on the phone but making no attempt to pretend like he wasn’t watching. If he evenwason the phone—she knew that he faked his own phone calls when he didn’t want to be bothered. Evil, meddlingbastard.
What the fuck?she mouthed at him, and he gave an insolent shrug, pointing to the receiver in a way that made her absolutely certain that he was not taking an actual call.
Even Annica looked over as she walked back to her desk, unlocking her computer one-handed and typing in her password, while scrambling for her phone.
Too busy to answer me, huh? But not too busy to mess around with my employment. How DARE you go over my head like that to Arthur. I don’t need you to micromanage my career. Not when the one you SHOULD be worrying about is your OWN.
She opened the list of bullet points and began line editing furiously.
Her phone lit up.
You said you didn’t want to be a kept woman.
I fail to see what that has to do with this situation.
Nicholas hung up his phone, putting an end to the charade.
If you’re a VP, you’ll be an executive.
Jay stared at her phone incredulously.And you think handing me the job like I’m one of those nepo babies is the solution? People are still going to think I fucked you for it.
I’m not handing it to you. You have to earn it.
Unbelievable. She shook with anger, and a deep, deep sense of disappointment.I can’t believe you.
Why is it unbelievable? You went to one of the best colleges in the country. The only reason you didn’t get snapped up after college like everyone else was because you allowed my father to make you think you were nothing without his name. I could put you in any position at this company and you would be too stubborn to fail, because that’s the kind of woman you are.
Jay stared at her phone.
In his twisted mind, he wasn’t meddling. He was removing barriers from her life to clear the road to—what, exactly?
Himself?
