He shook his head. ‘I do not believe this.’
‘I know it must be a shock and I never had any intention of getting you involved, but Angel, she has this dream to meet her father and I just want to make her happy. That’s all I’ve ever tried to do.’
‘I mean… how could you do this?’
‘What?’
‘Ten years ago, you have a child and… I do not… I cannot.’ His voice was raising in volume and his agitation was clear to see. He got to his feet, kicking at the wooden flooring and heading towards the Christmas tree. He threw his arms up in the air, bells on Bruce’s branches reacting as his fingertips swiped at them.
‘You say you were careful… I ask you this!’
‘I was drunk, Michel! And young and stupid!’
‘Ten years, Hayley,’ Michel stated.
‘I know how long it’s been.’
‘You do not find me when you know you are pregnant.’
‘Well, no, I mean, you were here and I was in England and we were both young. You wouldn’t want to settle down with a child. You had dreams to paint and take pictures, see the world.’
‘So you do not tell me?’
‘I…’ Hayley moved her eyes away. She didn’t know what she had been expecting but it hadn’t been this. So much anger and accusation.
‘You do not give me the choice?’
‘It was my problem.’ She swallowed, instantly regretting the word ‘problem’. Her mother had told her what to do and she had let her, too ashamed, too overwhelmed to have an opinion.He wouldn’t want to know. He was on the other side of the world.
‘I didn’t think—’ she began.
‘That is obvious.’ He made a noise of irritation like someone had pushed past him on the street.
She tried to even out her voice, taking a breath before continuing. ‘Listen, we have to deal with the situation as it stands now. I have a nine-year-old daughter who made a wish this year to meet her father.Yourdaughter. Now, it’s up to you.’
She waited for her words to sink in, watching him shift his feet, rubbing one trainer up against the other. He turned to face the window and Hayley watched him as the snowflakes flashed past the glass. What was he going to do?
He turned around to face her and she swallowed.
‘I am allowed to have a decision now, yes?’ Michel spat.
She opened her mouth, unsure what was going to come out. ‘Yes… of course… I…’
She watched him suck in a breath that filled his wiry frame, rocking him slightly until his hair fell over his face. What was he going to say?
‘I can’t deal with this, Hayley.’ He put his hands into his hair,wrapping it around his fingers until he was pulling it like someone in complete turmoil. ‘I just can’t deal with this.’
‘Listen… I know it’s a big thing… a huge thing but… nothing has to change for you. I mean, we can…’ She was talking so quickly, none of the words were coming out how she wanted them to. She just needed him to know that Angel just wanted the chance to get to know where she had come from.
‘Nothing has to change?!’ He shook his head, his hair responding to the motion. ‘You tell me I have a child! Everything has changed!’
She could feel the tears at the very edge of her eyelids. One blink and they would be slipping down her face. She had to hold it together.
‘I’m sorry.’ He strode towards her but moved past, heading for the door. ‘I can’t do this.’
‘Michel, please,’ she begged, reaching for his arm.
He shook her off and before she was really fully aware of it, she was hearing footfalls on the stairs and the slam of Dean’s front door.
