"Get some sleep," he says, steadying me when I sway without his support. "We'll talk about this tomorrow."
"Why?" The question comes out before I can stop it, before I can think better of asking. "Why did you protect me? All of you? I'm nothing to you. I'm just the girl you've been trying to break for weeks."
Caspian and Knox exchange a look I can't read even after everything that just happened. Nico won't meet my eyes and I can feel guilt bleeding through the broken bond between us.
"You're pack now," Caspian finally says, and there's something in his voice that sounds almost surprised, like he's still processing this himself. "Whether any of us planned for it or not. I claimed you in front of a Council enforcer. That makes you mine to protect."
"But why claim me at all? You could have just walked away and let Chase take me. Would have solved your problem."
"You're not a problem to be solved," Caspian says, and he sounds almost angry about it. "You're pack. That's what matters."
He turns and walks away before I can respond, Knox following him without a word. Nico hesitates, looks like he wants to say something, but then just shakes his head and leaves too.
I make it up to my room on shaking legs. Lily is still asleep, completely unaware that I just shifted for the first time, nearly got discovered by the Council, got claimed by an Alpha, and had three males protect me for reasons I don't fully understand. I collapse into bed without even taking off my jacket.
My whole body aches in ways I've never experienced before. Every muscle, every bone, every inch of skin feels wrong and sore and exhausted. My mind is spinning with everything that just happened. Caspian claimed me. Knox threatened to kill Nico to protect me. Nico, who betrayed me so thoroughly just days ago, just lied to a Council enforcer to keep me safe.
Nothing makes sense anymore. Everything has changed in the space of one night. I shifted into a silver wolf, the kind that's supposed to be extinct, the kind the Council kills on sight. And three males who should have either turned me in or walked away instead formed a protective wall between me and a Council enforcer who could have ended me with one word to his superiors.
I close my eyes but sleep doesn't come easily. How can it, when my whole world just turned upside down and I have no idea which way is up anymore? When I can still feel the echo of bones breaking and reforming? When I can still smell Chase's suspicion and Caspian's determination and Knox's threat and Nico's confusion?
When I finally do sleep, I dream of running through the forest on four silver legs, and I can't tell if it's a nightmare or something else entirely.
Chapter Twenty
Iwake to sunlight streaming through the window and every muscle in my body screaming in protest. For a moment I can't remember why everything hurts so much, and then it all comes flooding back. The shift. The pain. The silver fur. Three males protecting me from Chase.
I force myself to sit up and immediately regret it. My bones ache like they're still trying to remember what shape they're supposed to be.
"You're awake." Lily's voice comes from her bed across the room. She's sitting up with a book in her lap but I can tell she hasn't been reading it. "How are you feeling?"
"Like I got hit by a truck." My voice comes out rough, damaged.
"You've been asleep for almost twelve hours." She sets the book aside and moves to sit on the edge of my bed. "Nova, what happened last night? You came back around three in the morning and collapsed into bed without saying anything. I almost called the healer."
I consider lying. Consider telling her it was nothing. But she's going to find out eventually and I'm too exhausted to keep secrets from the one person who's been decent to me since I got here.
"I shifted. For the first time."
Her eyes go wide. "Your first shift at eighteen? Nova, that's dangerously late. That could have killed you."
"I know. It felt like it was trying to."
"Are you okay? Did anyone help you through it?"
I don't know how to answer that. Three males found me in the forest but I don't know if that counts as help or just being in the wrong place at the wrong time. "It's complicated."
Lily waits, clearly wanting me to explain more, but I don't know where to start or how much to tell her.
There's a knock on the door before I have to decide. Lily gets up to answer it and comes back with a folded piece of paper.
"Student messenger. Said it's for you."
I unfold the note with hands that are still shaking from shift exhaustion. The handwriting is exact and measured, the same handwriting I've seen on all my graded assignments.
My office. Today. 3pm. - Professor Harmon
My heart does something complicated in my chest when I see his name. Julian. He knows what happened. Of course he knows. Everyone apparently knows by now.
