The security employee looks at me puzzled, and I apologize again, then lift the duffel bag and put it into a second gray bin.
“This way, sir,” the security officer says, gesturing to the machine that will scan me.
Florian is on the other side of the glass. He is probably outside the airport by now. Probably telling the Uber driver to hurry as fast as he can.
I need to hurry too. I have a plane to catch.
Andthen I realize…
Even if Florian loves me… does it matter? I’m going to Massachusetts. I’ll be a thousand miles away from him. We’ll see each other in Puerto Rico… but that will only be for a few days.
And suddenly the airport looks as dark and dreary and dreadful as it probably always has.
CHAPTER
FORTY-TWO
Florian
I am late for my first practice.
Not very late.
But I have never been late for practice before, and this is my first one at this new job.
I jog inside. The security guard scans my badge, then I hurry as I try to weave my way to the locker room.
Coach Dawson raises his eyebrows. “Mr. Richter.”
“I’m sorry I’m late,” I say.
“Take a seat.”
“I was at the airport to drop off my—” I hesitate.
Is Mateo my boyfriend? We didn’t decide anything. We didn’t talk about anything.
“You can say boyfriend here,” Coach Dawson says. “Don’t let it happen again.”
“I promise.”
I hope the reason I’m promising isn’t that Mateo won’t ever visit me again.
What does ‘I love you’ mean? Does it mean he wants to bewith me? To move in with me? To be my boyfriend in the non-fake sense?
Because it’s also what one says to children or grandmothers or pets.
In German it’s easier. In German there are separate phrases. “Ich hab dich lieb” for acquaintances and family members and the otherwise adorable, and “ich liebe dich” for romantic love.
That’s what I meant.
Did he?
He must. He said it with such seriousness. He must.
Because I definitely do love him back.
I throw myself into practice and meeting people. A few of them mention that it sucks that my boyfriend is flying back, and I nod, because they’re right.
