She had not been avoiding Dominic, not exactly. It was more that she was too overwhelmed by the events of last night, unable to stop thinking of the way he had gently put his arm around her, how close they had been, how warm his chest had felt beneath her hands, how he had leaned in slowly and… for a moment, she had not wanted him to stop.
It was a miracle that shehadfound the sense to leave the study before anything happened, though her departure meant she would never know what might have occurred next. Part of her was certain that he had been about to kiss her, while the other part of her remembered keenly what he had said about never marrying again.
The conundrum of it all was something she had not been in any position to face. As such, she had not wanted to put herself in a situation where she might have to face it: namely, seeing Dominic.
“You can be honest with me, my lady,” Catherine said. “You know I won’t judge you.”
“I just did not want to see him today, that is all,” Frances replied, her tone cooler than she intended.
The lady’s maid offered a sympathetic smile. “Then I shan’t say any more about it.”
You see, this is exactly why it is a problem! Now, I am snapping at my friends.Frances glanced at her bed, tempted to climb right in and pull the covers over her head to hide herself for a while.
“I am sorry, Cathy,” she said. “I should not have spoken to you like that. I am… confused and under rather a lot of strain, but it is no excuse. Please, forgive me.”
Catherine gave a little nod. “You are forgiven, my lady. As I said, I can tell that you are not quite yourself, but if you want to speak of anything, just know that I’m here.” She paused, chuckling. “And, at present, I don’t have too much else to do.”
“I promise, when my mind is in some manner of order, and I am able to arrange my thoughts, I shall confide in you,” Frances urged. “For now, I think I might take a wander in the gardens, see if that cannot blow away some of this fog in my head.”
“Do you want company?”
Frances considered it, then shook her head. “No, solitude will serve me best.” She flashed her friend a grin. “Although, if you happen to hear a distant scream, please do not be alarmed. And tell the household that it must be foxes.”
“Of course, my lady,” Catherine agreed with a fond smile. “I’ll have some dinner waiting for you when you return.”
A great sigh emptied Frances’ lungs. “Cathy, what on earth would I do without you?”
“Go hungry, certainly. Scream a lot more. Have nothing to wear at short notice, and I fear your hair would be a catastrophe.” Catherine laughed. “Otherwise, you’d manage well enough.”
Frances smiled sadly. “No, Cathy, I do not think I would.”
There was so much more she wanted to say to her friend, to thank her for everything she had done, but the hour was getting late. If she did not take her walk now, she would be cooped up for the rest of the evening, too.
So, with a groan of sore muscles that had been stuck in one position for too long, she got to her feet, took her pelisse down from the hook by the door, and headed out.
The gardens were paradise in the burnished glow of sunset, the sandstone walls sparkling, the dew upon the buds and grasslike a sea of diamonds. The air smelled wonderful after the afternoon’s shower of rain, so fresh and earthy that she wished she might bottle it.
The gravel crunched pleasantly underfoot as she wandered along at her leisure, passing from walled garden to walled garden, imagining what it would all look like in the summer.
“Oh!” she barked as her boot disappeared into a puddle, deeper than it appeared.
Cold water seeped through the laced front, soaking into her stocking and down to her bare foot.
Was I enjoying myself too much?she groused silently up at the sky, as if the heavens themselves were responsible. Although, in a way, they were, for that was where the day’s rain had sprung from.
Muttering under her breath, she hobbled over to a nearby bench and bent forward to unlace her boot.
“Frances?”
She froze, holding onto the laces, as if some creative sculptor had carved her that way. ‘Soon-to-be spinster in danger’might have been a good title for it.
Though, it was not the London-alleyway-at-night sort of danger, but the danger of a bewildered mind and a wayward heart.
“Frances, I mean no harm,” Dominic said, his footfalls crunching down the path toward her. “I was taking a walk before dinner, and I happened to see you. I have not sought you out.”
She lifted her gaze to him… and wished he would have just one ugly day, where he did not look like the sort of windswept, rugged gentleman that Lucinda relished in reading about. Even with stubble, wearing that old coat of his, his hair loosely tied back, with dark crescents beneath his eyes, he was still the most handsome man that Frances had ever seen.
It was quite unfair.
